Fathers and daughters -- Fiction; London (England) -- Fiction; Man-woman relationships -- Fiction; Sisters -- Fiction
Keith's arm was about her as they descended; but he let it drop as they
stood once more in the golden-brown cabin. "Sit here!" He plumped a
cushion for her, and Jenny sank into an enveloping softness that rose
about her as water might have done, so that she might have been alarmed
if Keith had not been there looking down with such an expression of
concern.
"I'm really all right," she told him, reassuringly. "Miserable for a
tick--that's all!"
"Sure?" He seemed genuinely alarmed, scanning her face. She had again
turned sick and faint, so that her knees were without strength. Was he
sincere? If only she could have been sure of him. It meant everything in
the world to her. If only Keith would say he loved her: if only he would
kiss her! He had never done that. The few short days of their earlier
comradeship had been full of delight; he had taken her arm, he had even
had her in his arms during a wild bluster of wind; but always the
inevitable kiss had been delayed, had been averted; and only her eager
afterthoughts had made romance of their meagre acquaintance. Yet now,
when they were alone, together, when every nerve in her body seemed
tense with desire for him, he was somehow aloof--not constrained (for
then she would have been happy, at the profoundly affecting knowledge
that she had carried the day), but unsympathetically and unlovingly at
ease. She could not read his face: in his manner she read only a barren
kindness that took all and gave nothing. If he didn't love her she need
not have come. It would have been better to go on as she had been doing,
dreaming of him until--until what? Jenny sighed at the grey vision. Only
hunger had driven her to his side on this evening--the imperative hunger
of her nature upon which Keith had counted. He had been sure she would
come--that was unforgivable. He had welcomed her as he might have
welcomed a man; but as he might also have welcomed any man or woman who
would have relieved his loneliness upon the yacht. Not a loved friend.
Jenny, with her brain restored by the gentle breeze to its normal
quickness of action, seemed dartingly to seek in every direction for
reassurance! and she found in everything no single tone or touch to feed
her insatiable greed for tokens of his love. Oh, but she was miserable
indeed--disappointed in her dearest and most secret aspirations. He was
perhaps afraid that she wanted to attach herself to him? If that were
so, why couldn't he be honest, and tell her so? That was all she wanted
from him. She wanted only the truth. She felt she could bear anything
but this kindness, this charming detached thought for her. He was giving
her courtesy when all she needed was that his passion should approach
her own. And when she should have been strong, mistress of herself, she
was weak as water. Her strength was turned, her self-confidence mocked
by his bearing. She trembled with the recurring vehemence of her love,
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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