For, only a short hour before, the deep wound of the past had suddenly
been torn open, and memory had come with a rush of incidents to torture
her with the recollections of the bygone, of the rude awakening from the
golden dream of her girlhood's first love to the fact that the man who
had first made her heart increase its pulsations, the man she had
believed in her bright, young imagination to be the soul of chivalrous
honour, was a contemptible, low-minded _roue_. How she had refused to
believe it at first, and insisted to herself that all she had heard was
base calumny; and she had gone on defending him with indignation till
the cruel facts were forced upon her, and in one short minute she had
turned from a trustful, passionate, loving girl, to the disillusioned
woman, with no hope but to find some occupation which would deaden the
misery of her heart.
Since then her life had been one of patient self-denial, at first in
toiling among the suffering in the sordid homes of misery in one of the
worst parts of London. Here, while tending a woman dying of neglect and
injuries inflicted by some inhuman brute, it had struck her that she
might enlist the sympathies of the great surgeon whose name had long
been familiar, and ask him to come and try to save the woman's life.
To think with her was to act, and she waited on him humbly and
patiently, all the time trembling for the consequence to the injured
woman left almost alone. But at last her turn came, and she was ushered
into Sir Denton's presence.
He heard her patiently, and shook his head.
"It is impossible, my dear young lady," he said sharply. "I can but
battle with a few of the atoms of misery in the vast sands of troubled
life. From your description of the case, I fear I can do no good, and
my time for seeing patients here at home is over, while a score of poor
creatures are lying in agony at my hospital waiting their turn."
She looked at him despairingly, and he spoke more gently.
"I admire and respect the grand self-denial of such ladies as yourself
who devote themselves to these tasks, so do not think me unfeeling. It
is that I can only attend a certain number of cases every day."
"But you would go to some wealthy patient," she cried imploringly, "and
I will pay you whatever fee you ask."
"You wrong me, my dear young lady," he said gravely. "I would not go
to-day to any wealthy or great patient for any sum that could be offered
me. I take fees, but I hope my life is not so sordid as that."
"Forgive me," she said hastily. "I beg your pardon."
"Yes," he said, taking her hand to raise it reverently to his lips, "I
forgive you, my child, and I will prove it by seeing the poor woman of
whom you speak. Come."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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