Old Mole: Being the Surprising Adventures in England of Herbert Jocelyn Beenham, M.A., Sometime Sixth-Form Master at Thrigsby Grammar School in the County of LancasterCannan, Gilbert
General
Old Mole: Being the Surprising Adventures in England of Herbert Jocelyn Beenham, M.A., Sometime Sixth-Form Master at Thrigsby Grammar School in the County of Lancaster
Cannan, Gilbert
England -- Fiction; Husband and wife -- Fiction; Man-woman relationships -- Fiction; Theater -- Fiction
This was shocking ignorance. For twenty years and more Mr. Henry
Butcher's name had been in the newspapers, on the hoardings, and his
portrait, his wife's portrait, his baby's portrait, his dog's
portrait, his horse's portrait had appeared in the magazines, and his
commendation of a certain brand of cigarette had for the last ten
years been used by the makers as an advertisement. For all that, his
name and personality had not penetrated Old Mole's consciousness.
"Did you buy the play?" asked Matilda.
"I lent him fifty pounds, and he left it with me. I had no very clear
idea as to his intention."
"Is it a good play?"
"You shall read it."
He unearthed it with some difficulty and gave it to her. She read it
and wept over it.
"Is it a good play?" he asked.
"I don't know, but it's a lovely part."
He went to see Mr. Brown, a flashy little Cockney who peppered him
with illustrious literary names and talked about everything but the
business in hand. Old Mole asked where Timmis might be, and Mr. Brown
said he had heard from him only once, and that from a place called
Crown Imperial, in British Columbia.
"A good fellow, Timmis, but cracked. Impatient, you know. I never can
make young writers see that they've got to wait until the old birds
drop off the perch before their masterpieces can come home to roost."
"Is 'Lossie Loses' a masterpiece?" asked Old Mole innocently.
"Between ourselves," replied the agent, "I don't think there's much in
it. But Mr. Butcher has been having a lean period lately and wanted
something cheap, and thought he'd try a new author."
He produced the contract. Old Mole read it through in a sort of dream
and signed it. He was shown out with a hearty handshake, and that very
evening he received from Mr. Brown a check for ninety pounds--a
hundred in advance of royalties less 10 per cent. commission. He was
disconcerted. There was some uncanny wizardry in it that, by merely
walking into an office and signing a paper, one could at the end of
the day be the richer by ninety pounds with never a stroke of work
done for it. His first impulse was to give the check to Matilda, but,
on reflection, he decided to give her forty and to keep the fifty for
Timmis if he could be found. He looked up Crown Imperial, British
Columbia, on the map and in the gazetteer, but there was no mention of
it, and, concluding that it must be a new place, he wrote to Timmis
there in the hope of catching him. When he had posted his letter he
remembered that Timmis might have dropped his stage name, and wrote
another letter to Cuthbert Jones. Then he brushed the play from his
mind.
Within a fortnight it was impossible to walk along any of the main
thoroughfares of London without seeing the words "Lossie Loses," with
the name of Mr. Henry Butcher in enormous letters, and the name of
Carlton Timmis in very small print.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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