Old Mole: Being the Surprising Adventures in England of Herbert Jocelyn Beenham, M.A., Sometime Sixth-Form Master at Thrigsby Grammar School in the County of LancasterCannan, Gilbert
General
Old Mole: Being the Surprising Adventures in England of Herbert Jocelyn Beenham, M.A., Sometime Sixth-Form Master at Thrigsby Grammar School in the County of Lancaster
Cannan, Gilbert
England -- Fiction; Husband and wife -- Fiction; Man-woman relationships -- Fiction; Theater -- Fiction
He sat up until half-past one with the chamber growing ever more chill
and empty, and his heart sinking as he thought of accidents that might
have befallen them. He was asleep on their return and never knew its
precise hour. They gave a perfectly frank and probable account of
their doings: dinner at a grill-room, a music-hall, supper at a German
restaurant, and then on to an At Home at the Schlegelmeiers', where
there had been a squash so thick that once you were in a room it was
impossible to move to any of the others. They had been wedged into the
gallery of the great drawing-room at Withington House, where the
principal entertainment had been a Scotch comedian who chanted lilting
ballads. It was this distinguished artist's habit to make his audience
sing the chorus of each song, and it had been diverting to see
duchesses and ladies of high degree and political hostesses singing
with the abandon of the gods at an outlying two-shows-a-night house:
_Rolling, rolling in the heather,
All in the bonny August weather,
There was me and Leezy Lochy in the dingle,
There was Jock and Maggie Kay in the dell,
For ilka lassie has her laddie,
And ilka laddie has his lassie,
And what they dae together I'll na tell,
But Leezy, Leezy Lochy in the dingle,
Is bonny as the moon above the heather._
Matilda sang the song all through and made Old Mole and Panoukian
troll the chorus. There were a freshness and warmth about her that
were almost startling, full of mischief and sparkling fun. She teased
both the men and mysteriously promised them a great reward if they
could guess a riddle.
"My second is in woman but not in man, my first is French, I have two
syllables, and you'll never guess."
"Where did you get it?" asked Panoukian.
"I made it up."
So they tried to guess and soon confessed themselves beaten. Then she
told them that the second half of the riddle was _sense_, because she
never knew a man who had it; and the first half was _non_ and together
they made _nonsense_, because she felt like it.
Her mood lasted for five days. Panoukian came in every evening--(she
was rehearsing for a new play, but only in the daytime)--and they
frolicked and sang and burlesqued their own solemn discussions. On the
sixth day her high spirits sank and she was moody and silent. She
forbade Panoukian to come in the evening. He came at teatime, and she
stayed out. One day Old Mole had tea with Panoukian. They walked in
the Temple Gardens afterward, and Panoukian blurted out:
"I don't know if your wife has told you, sir, but after we left the
Schlegelmeiers' it was such a glorious night, and we were so glad to
be in the air again, that we took a taxi and drove down to Richmond
and came back in the dawn. There wasn't any harm in it, as you and I
see things, but I've been thinking it over and come to the conclusion
that you ought to know."
A sudden anger took possession of Old Mole, and he retorted:
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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