Old Mole: Being the Surprising Adventures in England of Herbert Jocelyn Beenham, M.A., Sometime Sixth-Form Master at Thrigsby Grammar School in the County of LancasterCannan, Gilbert
General
Old Mole: Being the Surprising Adventures in England of Herbert Jocelyn Beenham, M.A., Sometime Sixth-Form Master at Thrigsby Grammar School in the County of Lancaster
Cannan, Gilbert
England -- Fiction; Husband and wife -- Fiction; Man-woman relationships -- Fiction; Theater -- Fiction
lessons with the conductor of the orchestra, who was also organist of
a church and eked out a meager living with instruction on the violin,
'cello, piano, organ, flute, trombone, tympani, voice production and
singing--(all this was set forth on his card, which he left on Old
Mole by way of assuring himself that all was as it should be and he
would be paid for his trouble). Matilda had four lessons a week, and
she practiced most industriously. "It was not," said her instructor,
"as though she were training for op'ra, but just to get the voice
clear and refine it. . . ." He was very genteel, was Mr. Edwin Watts,
and he did more for her pronunciation in a week than Old Mole had been
able to accomplish in a year and more. His gentility discovered the
gentleman in his pupil's husband, and he invited them to his house,
and gave them tickets for concerts and the Tower and a series of organ
recitals he was giving in his church. He was a real musician, but he
was alone in his music, for he had an invalid wife who looked down on
his profession and would admit none of his friends to the house, which
she filled with suites of furniture, china knickknacks, lace curtains
and pink ribbons. The little man lived in perpetual distrust of
himself, admired his wife because he loved her, and submitted to her
taste, regarding his own as a sort of unregenerate longing. Neither
Old Mole nor Matilda were musical, but, when his wife was out to tea
with the wife of the bank manager or the chemist, Watts would invite
them to his parlor and play the piano--Bach, Beethoven, Chopin--until
they could take in no more and his music was just a noise to them. But
there was no exhausting his capacity or his energy, and when they were
thoroughly worn out he used to play "little things of his own." He was
very religious and full of cranks, a great reader of the
advertisements in the newspapers, and there was no patent medicine,
hair restorer, magnetic belt, uric acid antidote that he had not
tried. He was proud of it, and used to say:
"I've tried 'em all except the bust preservers."
It was precisely here that he and Old Mole found common ground. With
his new mental activity Old Mole had become increasingly sensitive to
any sluggishness in his internal organs and began to resent his
tendency to fleshiness. He and Mr. Watts had immense discussions, and
the musician produced remedies for every ailment and symptom.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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