"A Clergyman in Essex, who had long _farmed_ his _tythes_ alternately among his parishioners, began at last to suspect that the rogues endeavoured to keep the income of his _small_ living still _less_, and so determined, this year at least, to take his _tythes in kind_. To '_Cheat the Parson_' is one of the oldest jokes in the history of agriculture, and stands on the same authority with the _wittier malevolence_ of _distressing_ him. These gentlemen, determined not to be behindhand with their predecessors: and, in the last harvest, sent to the Parson to take away his _hay_ the moment it was cut down, alleging, that as soon as it was cut into _swathes_, it was no longer grass, and that he might _turn it, and cook it, himself_. Rather than 'go to law' the Parson submitted, and took his next Sunday's text on _brotherly kindness_, beginning thus--'Brotherly kindness may be divided into _three_ parts--domestic affection--social love--and charity: from all which proper inferences may be drawn for instruction. Thus brethren, I give you a sermon in _swathes_--you may turn it, and cook it, yourselves.' The plan succeeded; his parishioners doubled the income, acknowledging it even then less than it should be: and thus, what _justice_, and _law_, might have kept from him for years, was given up to a _clerical joke_."--(_Times, Sept. 19, 1795._) * * * * * "A curious circumstance occurred here (Brighton) yesterday. Sir John Lade, for a trifling wager, undertook to carry Lord Cholmondely, on _his back_, from opposite the Pavilion, twice round the Steine. Several ladies attended to be spectators of this extraordinary feat of the dwarf carrying a giant. When his Lordship declared himself ready, Sir John desired him to _strip_. 'Strip!' exclaimed the other: 'why surely you promised to carry me in my clothes!' 'By no means,' replied the Baronet. 'I engaged to carry _you_, but not an inch of clothes. So therefore, my Lord, make ready, and let us not _disappoint_ the ladies.' After much laughable altercation, it was at length decided that Sir John had won his wager, the Peer declining to exhibit _in puris naturalibus_."--(_Times, Oct. 2, 1795._) What would the writer of the following have thought if he could only have seen Girton and other cognate female Colleges? "Nobody can doubt of the use and advantage of Boarding-Schools in an immense capital like this. When a Tradesman's daughter is taught to jump a dance, to play a tune, and spit French, she is fit for any thing--but a wife."--(_Times, Oct. 17, 1795._) * * * * *