Forgiveness -- Fiction; Guilt -- Fiction; Love -- Fiction
The skiff approached. Irma's expression rapidly changed from one of joy
to that of disappointment.
It was not the king. It was Baron Schoning who greeted her.
He sprang into the boat, kissed her trembling hand and told her how
happy he was to meet her there.
They alighted. The baron offered his arm to Irma and they walked along
the bank, the maid going before. In the distance, Irma could see the
lackey who, on the previous day, had been speaking to hers. Had not the
servant said that his master had been waiting here for a long time? Had
not Baron Schoning, before this, been open in his attentions to her?
His words soon relieved her of all doubt on that score.
"We are alone here, in the presence only of the mountains, the lake and
the heavens. Dearest Countess! May I speak of something that lies near
my heart and which I have for a long while desired to tell you?"
She silently nodded assent.
"Well then, permit me to tell you that the court is not the right place
for you."
"I am not quite sure that I shall return there; but why do you think me
out of place there?"
"Because there is something in you which will always prevent you from
feeling at home there. You are surprised to hear me, the jester, the
court warbler, speak thus. I know very well I bear that title; but
believe me, Countess, while they imagine they are playing with me, I am
amusing myself at their expense. You, Countess, will never feel at home
at court. You do not accept that life and its customs, as fixed and
settled. You interpret it according to your own peculiar views; your
mind cannot wear a uniform; your soul utters its deepest feelings in
its own dialect, and when your utterances get abroad in the liveried
world, they find it exceedingly original, but strange and--no one knows
it better than I--you have not, and never will have aught in common
with those who surround you."
"I should not have believed that you could thus look into my heart; but
I thank you."
"I am not looking into your heart; I live in it. Oh, Countess! Oh! thou
child-like and all-loving heart, tremble not! Suffer me to clasp
this hand in mine, while I tell you that I, too, am a stranger there,
and have resolved to retire from court and live for myself on
yonder patrimonial estate of mine. Irma, will you render my life a
thousand-fold happier than it can otherwise be? Will you be my wife?"
It was long before Irma could answer him. At last she said:
"My friend--yes, my friend--on yonder island there lives a friend of
mine who is dead, both to herself and me. Fate deals kindly with
me and sends me another in her stead. I thank you--but--I am so
confused--perhaps more than-- But look, dear baron, at the little
cottage half-way up the mountain. I would be content to live there--to
grow my cabbages, milk my goats, plant my hemp, make my clothes--and
could be happy, desiring nothing, forgetting the world and forgotten by
it."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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