"Hallelujah! I have just come from church. Oh, that my song could reach you. I have just sung the Hallelujah as if I were pouring out my whole soul to God above. "Hallelujah! "All is well! "The crown prince is born! "The queen is doing well. The king is happy! the world is bright, and the blue sky overhead is cloudless. "God be praised, that I have so soon escaped from my perplexing doubts. Perhaps it was all imagination, after all. There was not the slightest ground for my alarm. "I am but a silly cloister plant, after all, and do not yet understand the ways of the court. Is it not so? I see you laughing at me, and see the dimples in your cheeks. I send you many kisses. Ah, all are so good and pious, and holy, and happy, and-- If I could only compose, I should produce some great work. A mute Beethoven dwells within my soul." "_July 18th_. "The crown prince's nurse is a peasant woman from the Highlands. At the king's desire, I paid her a visit. I was standing by the prince's cradle, when the king approached. "Softly he whispered to me: 'It is indeed true; there is an angel standing by my child's cradle.' "My hand was on the rail, and his hand rested on mine. "The king left the room, and just imagine what happened afterward. "The nurse, a fresh and hardy-looking peasant woman, with shrewd blue eyes--a perfect rustic beauty, indeed, to whom I had been kind in order to cheer up, and prevent her from growing homesick--now turned upon me and told me harshly, and to my face: 'You're an adulteress; you've been exchanging love-glances with the king!' "Emma, I now feel the force of what you have often said to me: 'You idolize the people; but they are just as sinful and corrupt as the great world, and without education to curb and restrain them.' "But what is the peasant woman to me, after all? Certain persons exist, only in so far as they serve our purposes. "No, she is a good and sensible woman, and has asked me to forgive her boldness. I shall remain her friend. I shall, indeed." "_June 25th_. "The king evinces the greatest kindness toward me. It is only yesterday that he remarked to me, while passing: "'Should you ever have a secret, confide it to me.' "He knows full well that I could hardly go to my brother, as a sister should, and that my father is so far away. "Colonel Bronnen, of the queen's regiment, is very attentive to me. He is usually quite reserved. Ah, how I envy those who possess such self-control. I have none. The demonstrative are always flattering themselves that their irrepressibility is simple honesty, whereas it is nothing but weakness. "Bronnen tells me that you write to him at times. Can it be possible that a single thought of yours enters this palace, without being mine?