English fiction -- 20th century; Humorous stories, English; Short stories, English
Roger Dangerfield, the famous barrister, is passing through Gordon
Square one December night when he suddenly comes across the dead body of
a man of about forty years. To his horror he recognises it to be that of
his friend, Sir Eustace Butt, M.P., who has been stabbed in seven
places. Much perturbed by the incident, Roger goes home and decides to
lead a new life. Hitherto he had been notorious in the London clubs for
his luxurious habits, but now he rises at 7.30 every morning and
breathes evenly through the nose for five minutes before dressing.
After three weeks of the breathing exercise, Roger adds a few simple
lunges to his morning drill. Detective-Inspector Frenchard tells him
that he has a clue to the death of Sir Eustace, but that the murderer is
still at large. Roger sells his London house and takes a cottage in the
country, where he practises the simple life. He is now lunging ten times
to the right, ten times to the left and ten times backwards every
morning, besides breathing lightly through the nose during his bath.
One day he meets a Yogi, who tells him that if he desires to track the
murderer down he must learn concentration. He suggests that Roger should
start by concentrating on the word "wardrobe," and then leaves this
story and goes back to India. Roger sells his house in the country and
comes back to town, where he concentrates for half an hour daily on the
word "wardrobe," besides, of course, persevering with his breathing and
lunging exercises. After a heavy morning's drill he is passing through
Gordon Square when he comes across the body of his old friend, Sir
Joshua Tubbs, M.P., who has been stabbed nine times. Roger returns home
quickly, and decides to practise breathing through the ears.
CHAPTER XCI
PREPARATION
The appalling death of Sir Joshua Tubbs, M.P., following so closely upon
that of Sir Eustace Butt, M.P., meant the beginning of a new life for
Roger. His morning drill now took the following form:--
On rising at 7.30 a.m. he sipped a glass of distilled water, at the same
time concentrating on the word "wardrobe." This lasted for ten minutes,
after which he stood before the open window for five minutes, breathing
alternately through the right ear and the left. A vigorous series of
lunges followed, together with the simple kicking exercises detailed in
chapter LIV.
These over, there was a brief interval of rest, during which our hero,
breathing heavily through the back of the head, concentrated on the word
"dough-nut." Refreshed by the mental discipline, he rose and stood
lightly on the ball of his left foot, at the same time massaging himself
vigorously between the shoulders with his right. After five minutes of
this he would rest again, lying motionless except for a circular
movement of the ears. A cold bath, a brisk rub down and another glass of
distilled water completed the morning training.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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