"MY DEAR NEPHEW,--I was so glad to get your nice little letter and to hear that you were working hard. Let me know when it is your bath-night again; these things always interest me. I shall be delighted to play golf with you on Monday. You will have no difficulty in recognizing me. I should describe myself roughly as something like Apollo and something like Little Tich, if you know what I mean. It depends how you come up to me. I am an excellent golfer and never take more than two putts in a bunker. "Till 2.30 then. I enclose a postal-order for sixpence, to see you through the rest of the term. "Your favourite uncle, "EDWARD." I showed it to Celia. "Perhaps you could describe him more minutely," I said. "I hate wandering about vaguely and asking everybody I see if he's my uncle. It seems so odd." "You're sure to meet all right," said Celia confidently. "He's--well, he's nice-looking and--and clean-shaven--and, oh, _you'll_ recognize him." At 2.30 on Monday I arrived at the club-house and waited for my uncle. Various people appeared, but none seemed in want of a nephew. When 2.45 came there was still no available uncle. True, there was one unattached man reading in a corner of the smoke-room, but he had a moustache--the sort of heavy moustache one associates with a major. At three o'clock I became desperate. After all, Celia had not seen Edward for some time. Perhaps he had grown a moustache lately; perhaps he had grown one specially for to-day. At any rate there would be no harm in asking this major man if he was my uncle. Even if he wasn't he might give me a game of golf. "Excuse me," I said politely, "but are you by any chance my Uncle Edward?" "Your _what_?" "I was almost certain you weren't, but I thought I'd just ask. I'm sorry." "Not at all. Naturally one wants to find one's uncle. Have you--er--lost him long?" "Years," I said sadly. "Er--I wonder if you would care to adopt me--I mean, give me a game this afternoon. My man hasn't turned up." "By all means. I'm not very great." "Neither am I. Shall we start now? Good." I was sorry to miss Edward, but I wasn't going to miss a game of golf on such a lovely day. My spirits rose. Not even the fact that there were no caddies left and I had to carry my own clubs could depress me. The Major drove. I am not going to describe the whole game; though my cleek shot at the fifth hole, from a hanging lie to within two feet of the---- However, I mustn't go into that now. But it surprised the Major a good deal. And when at the next hole I laid my brassie absolutely dead, he---- But I can tell you about that some other time. It is sufficient to say now that, when we reached the seventeenth tee, I was one up.