Once Aboard the Lugger-- The History of George and his MaryHutchinson, A. S. M. (Arthur Stuart-Menteth)
General
Once Aboard the Lugger-- The History of George and his Mary
Hutchinson, A. S. M. (Arthur Stuart-Menteth)
Fiction; Humorous stories
Upon this night Mr. Marrapit was himself abed of the chill that Margaret
had mentioned in her note to Bill. But the review was not therefore
foregone. Upon his back, night-capped head on pillow propped, he lay as
the minute-hand of his clock ticked towards ten.
His brow ruffled against a sound without his door. He called:
“Mrs. Armitage!”
“Sir?” spoke Mrs. Armitage through the oak.
“Breathe less stertorously.”
Mrs. Armitage, his cook, waiting outside upon the mat, gulped wrath;
respirated through open mouth.
The clock at Mr. Marrapit's elbow gave the first chime of ten. Instantly
Mrs. Armitage tapped.
“Enter,” said Mr. Marrapit.
She waddled her stout figure to him. Behind her Clara and Ada, those
trim maids, took place.
Mr. Marrapit addressed her. “To-morrow, Mrs. Armitage, arouse your girls
at six. Speed them at their toilet; set them to clean your flues.”
He glanced at a tablet taken from beneath his pillow. “At 4.6 this
afternoon I smelt soot.”
“The flues were cleaned this morning, sir.”
“Untrue. Your girls were late. Prone in suffering upon my couch, my ears
tell me all that is accomplished in every part of the house. Ten minutes
after your girls descended I heard the kitchen fire roar. I suspect
paraffin.”
Mrs. Armitage wriggled to displace the blame. “I rose them at six, sir.
They sleep that heavy and they take that long to dressing, it's a wonder
to me they ever do get down.”
Mr. Marrapit addressed the sluggards. “Shun the enervating couch. Spring
to the call. Cleanliness satisfied, adorn not the figure; pursue the
duties. Ponder this. Seek help to effect it. Contrive a special prayer.
To your beds.”
They left him; upon the mat encountered Frederick, and him, in abandon
of relief, dug vitally with vulgar thumbs.
II.
Squirming, Frederick, the gardener's boy, advanced to the bedside.
Mr. Marrapit sternly regarded him: “Recite your misdeeds.”
“I've done me jobs, sir.”
“Prostrated, I cannot check your testimony. One awful eye above alone
can tell. Upon your knees this night search stringently your heart.
Bend.”
Frederick inclined his neck until his forehead was upon the coverlet.
Mr. Marrapit scanned the neck.
“Behind the ears are stale traces. Cleanse abundantly. To your bed.”
Without the door Frederick encountered Mr. Fletcher. “You let me catch
you reading abed to-night,” Mr. Fletcher warned him.
“Cleanse yer blarsted ear-'oles,” breathed Frederick, pushing past.
III.
Mr. Fletcher moved in to the presence.
“Is all securely barred, bolted and shuttered?” Mr. Marrapit asked.
“It's all right.”
“I am apprehensive. This is the first night I have not accompanied you
upon your round. Colossal responsibility lies upon you. Should thieves
break through and steal, upon your head devolves the crime.”
Wearily Mr. Fletcher repeated: “It's all right.”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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