With scarlet face and watery eyes, Miss Porter--the stout young woman who presided over this department, and whose habit it was to suck sweets the better to beguile the tedium of her duties--gazed at him; made guttural sounds. The start of George's knock had caused this girl to swallow a particularly large sweet, and its downward passage was inflicting upon her considerable pain. Her face was an alarming sight. “I'm afraid--” George began. “Pardon!” gasped Miss Porter, driving the sweet with a tremendous swallow. “Pardon!” “Not at all,” George pleasantly said. “Not at all. I called with reference to a lady-help.” The grinding sweet forbade the pleasant dalliance Miss Porter could have wished with this handsome young man. In a brave spasm (this girl was in great suffering), “I will tell the Principal,” she said; trod heavily to Miss Ram's door. Fate is an abominable trickster; loves to tease us. With one hand it gave Miss Porter a delectable male; with the other prevented her enjoying him. Furthermore, it prematurely deprived her of a fine sweet. Reappearing and holding the door ajar: “Miss Ram will see you,” she murmured. Tears were in this girl's eyes; the bolted sweet was still paining her very much indeed. IV. In two clever bows Miss Ram without a word greeted George; indicated a chair. George sat down. “I want,” he began--“that is, my uncle wants, a lady-help--” “Name, please,” rapped Miss Ram, opening the ledger. George gave it; stretched a leg to indicate a confidence he did not feel; pitched his voice to aid the presentment. “When I say lady-help--” “Address, please,” said Miss Ram with a pistol-snap. George withdrew the signs of confidence with a jerk. He gave the information. Then waited Miss Ram to give him a lead. He had twice been shot; was in no desire again to expose his person. Miss Ram fixed her small black eyes upon him. She said nothing. The intrusion of a young man into matters essentially domestic she strongly disapproved. Under “D” in “Aphorisms” this woman had a trenchant note touching this matter. “_D. Domesticity. Domesticity_,” said this note, “_is the offspring of all the womanly virtues. The virtues impregnate the woman, and domesticity is the resultant child. Absence of a single womanly trait aborts or debilitates the offspring. Men have nothing whatever to do with it, and nothing is more abominable than a man who meddles with domestic matters._” The rays of Miss Ram's disconcerting eye pushed George steadily backwards from the rock of such small confidence as remained to him. Assailed by the inquiring bows with which she now interrogated his further purpose, he slipped from it, plunged wildly into the sea of what he required, and for five minutes beat this way and that, hurling the splash of broken sentences at Miss Ram's unbending countenance.