“That ain't my platform, stranger. Civilization never got anything from painters or sculptors. They never taught mankind to be truthful or patient or self-denyin' or charitable. You may look at a bronze Hercules till you 're black in the face, and it will never make you give a cent to a lame cripple. I 'll go further again, stranger, and I 'll say that there ain't anything has thrown so many stumblin'-blocks before pro- gress as what you call the Arts, for there ain't the equal o' them to make people idlers. What's all that loafing about galleries, I ask ye, but the worst of all idling? If you want them sort of emotions, go to the real article, sir. Look at an hospital, that's more life-like than Gerard Dow and his dropsical woman,--ay, and may touch your heart, belike, before you get away.” “Though your conversation interests me much, sir, you will pardon my observing that I feel myself an intruder.” “No, you ain't; I'm jest in a talkin' humor, and I'd rather have _you_ than that Italian crittur, as don't understand me.” “Even the flattery of your observation, sir, cannot make me forget that another object claims my attention.” “For I 've remarked,” resumed Quackinboss, as if in continuation of his speech, “that a foreigner that don't know English wearies after a while in listenin', even though you 're tellin' him very interesting things.” “I perceive, sir,” said Ogden, rising, “that I have certainly been mistaken in the address. I was told that at the Palazzo Barsotti--” “Well, you 're jest there; that's what they call this ramshackle old crazy consarn. Their palaces, bein' main like their nobility, would be all the better for a little washin' and smartenin' up.” “You can perhaps, however, inform me where Lord Agincourt _does_ live?” “Well, he lives, as I may say, a little promiscuous. If he ain't _here_. it's because he's _there!_ You understand?” “I cannot say very confidently that I do understand,” said Ogden, slowly. “It was well as you was n't a practisin' lawyer, Britisher, for you ain't smart! that's a fact. No, sir; you ain't smart!” “Your countrymen's estimate of that quality has a high standard, sir,” said Ogden, haughtily. “What do you mean by my countrymen?” asked the other, quickly. “I ventured to presume that you were an American,” said Ogden, with a supercilious smile. “Well, stranger, you were main right; though darn me con-siderable if I know how you discovered it. Don't you be a-goin', now that we 're gettin' friendly together. Set down a bit. Maybe you 'd taste a morsel of something.” “Excuse me, I have just dined.” “Well, mix a summut in your glass. It's a rare pleasure to me, stranger, to have a chat with a man as talks like a Christian. I'm tired of 'Come si fa,'--that's a fact, sir.” “I regret that I cannot profit by your polite invitation,” said Ogden, bowing stiffly. “I had been directed to this house as the residence of Lord Agincourt and his tutor; and as neither of them live here--”