“If the prize be such as you say, is not the chance worth something?”
And these words were uttered with a downcast shyness that made every
syllable of them thrill within him.
“What does she mean?” thought he, in all the flurry of his excited
feelings. “Is she merely playing me off to make use of me, or am I to
believe that she really will--after all? Though I confess to thirty-
eight--I am actually no more than forty-two--only a little bald and gray
in the whiskers, and--confound it, she guesses what is passing through
my head.--What _are_ you laughing at; do, I beg of you, tell me truly
what it is?” cried he, aloud.
“I was thinking of an absurd analogy, Mr. Stocmar; some African
traveller--I'm not sure that it is not Mungo Park--mentions that he used
to estimate the depth of the rivers by throwing stones into them, and
watching the time it took for the air bubbles to come up to the surface.
Now, I was just fancying what a measure of human motives might be
fashioned out of the interval of silence which intervenes between some
new impression and the acknowledgment of it. You were gravely and
seriously asking yourself, 'Am I in love with this woman?'”
“I was,” said he, solemnly.
“I knew it,” said she, laughing. “I knew it.”
“And what was the answer--do you know _that_ too?” asked he, almost
sternly.
“Yes, the answer was somewhat in this shape: 'I don't half trust her!'”
They both laughed very joyously after this, Stocmar breaking out into a
second laugh after he had finished.
“Oh! Mr. Stocmar,” cried she, suddenly, and with an impetuosity that
seemed beyond her control, “I have no need of a declaration on your
part. I can read what passes in _your_ heart by what I feel in my own.
We have each of us seen that much of life to make us afraid of rash
ventures. We want better security for our investments in affection than
we used to do once on a time, not alone because we have seen so many
failures, but that our disposable capital is less. Come now, be frank,
and tell me one thing,--not that I have a doubt about it, but that I 'd
like to hear it from yourself,--confess honestly, you know who I am and
all about me?”
So sudden and so unexpected was this bold speech, that Stocmar, well
versed as he was in situations of difficulty, felt actually overcome
with confusion; he tried to say something, but could only make an
indistinct muttering, and was silent.
“It required no skill on my part to see it,” continued she. “Men so well
acquainted with life as you, such consummate tacticians in the world's
strategies, only make one blunder, but you all of you make _that_: you
always exhibit in some nameless little trait of manner a sense of
ascendancy over the woman you deem in your power. You can't help it.
It's not through tyranny, it's not through insolence,--it is just the
man-nature in you, that's all.”
“If you read us truly, you read us harshly too,” began he. But she cut
him short, by asking,--
“And who was your informant? Paten, was n't it?”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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