“I sometimes think we might have been happier if we had been poorer,”
Maude said, dreamily, by-and-by. “I can’t help fancying how we might
have lived in some quiet country place, in a low-roofed, old-fashioned
cottage, with a garden all round it and a churchyard close by, and the
smell of cows and the cooing of pigeons; and then I need not have been
separated from----.” She did not finish the sentence; she was talking to
herself rather than to Julia. Her face was beautified by an
inexpressible softness and tenderness as she murmured that broken
sentence. Her thoughts wandered back to the time in which she and
Harcourt Lowther had sworn eternal constancy, standing with their hands
locked together in the dim summer twilight, on the bank of the shadowy
river. She thought of that time, and all the freshness of feeling that
had gone down with it came back upon her suddenly, like a breath of air
from a distant ocean. How frivolous her life had been since then!--how
selfish and useless! What a round of dress and decoration, and hurry and
weariness! Harcourt Lowther’s last letter was in her pocket as she sat
musing despondently by the hired Brighton hearth;--his last letter, a
most melancholy epistle, full of despairing lamentations about the
bitterness of separation and the hardships of Van Diemen’s Land. And
over and above all these feminine perplexities which tormented poor
loving Maude, there seemed real cause for anxiety in the state of Mr.
Hillary’s health. It was not that the merchant himself complained; he
did not complain, and, indeed, appeared to resent any inquiries as to
his state, even when those inquiries came from such a privileged person
as his only child. But every morning at the breakfast-table, sitting
opposite to her father in the bright sunlight, Maude could see a darker
shade under Mr. Hillary’s eyes, a more weary look about his haggard
face. She defied his anger very often, and pleaded earnestly with him,
imploring him to consult a physician; but his answer was always very
much the same.
“I am subject to this sort of headache; my work in Moorgate Street is
peculiarly hard just now. Pray do not trouble yourself, Maude; there is
not the least occasion for any uneasiness about my health.”
With such assurances as these Miss Hillary was compelled to be
satisfied. There had been an air of coldness, or almost displeasure, in
her father’s manner to her lately, and Maude found to her surprise that
he was by no means pleased with the matrimonial engagement that had
arisen between Julia Desmond and Francis Tredethlyn.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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