Only a Girl: or, A Physician for the Soul.Hillern, Wilhelmine von
General
Only a Girl: or, A Physician for the Soul.
Hillern, Wilhelmine von
German fiction -- Translations into English
"Countess!" he exclaimed, "do not carry your scorn of me too far. I am
sunk low enough, it is true, since I thus chaffer and bargain with you
to sell you my assistance for a single kiss. For this single caress I
would resign my life! The thought of you is the madness that robs me of
sleep at night, makes me hesitate and stammer when I stand before my
pupils in the lecture-room, and prevents me from enjoying the food that
I eat. A single kiss from you is more bliss than such a wretched man as
I should hope to enjoy. But I am not yet sunk so low as to hire myself
out for money, and although you may hold me in contempt, you shall at
least pay some respect to the position of German professor, which I
have the honour to hold!"
The countess was silent for awhile, struck by his words. But such
embarrassment could last but a moment with a woman conscious of the
power to atone by a smile for the grossest insult. "Come here! Forgive
me! I have erred, but I repent."
"Oh, light of my life!" cried Herbert, seizing her offered hand, and
pressing it to his breast. "Forgive--forgive you? With what unnumbered
pains would I not purchase the joy of such a request! The only thing I
cannot forgive you is that such a woman as you should love this
Möllner."
"Indeed!--and why?"
"Because he is not worthy of you. Look you,--were you to give yourself
to an emperor or a king, I could bear it without a murmur. Crowned
heads are entitled to the costliest of earth's treasures,--how could I
covet what kings alone could win? But that one of my own class should
call you his,--one with no special claim of birth, culture, or
intellect,--with nothing that I too do not myself possess, except a
physique that is his in common with any prize-fighter,--the thought is
madness!"
A dark flush coloured the beautiful woman's brow. "I have not even
acknowledged to myself why I love this Möllner. I never hold myself
responsible for my impulses--every passion bears its divine credentials
in itself. But you have just revealed to me what so enraptures me in
this Möllner. Yes! it is nothing else than what we admire as the
highest attribute of humanity--a noble, genuine manhood. I think I have
read in some poet, 'Take him for all in all, he was a man!' But this
man is more; he is what I have never in my life seen before,--a
virtuous man. This, my good little professor, is his charm, his
advantage over monarchs even,--enabling him to buy what is his now and
forever,--my heart! Oh, there can be no more exquisite flower in the
garden of Paradise than this which I hope to pluck--the devotion of
this virtuous man. It is the bliss of Eve when she breathed the first
kiss upon the lips of the first man and marked his first blush!"
The beautiful woman, speaking more to herself than to the miserable man
by her side, leaned back upon her lounge and exclaimed with a heavy
sigh, "Oh, what a divine office for a woman--to teach a man like this
to love!"
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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