Only a Girl: or, A Physician for the Soul.Hillern, Wilhelmine von
General
Only a Girl: or, A Physician for the Soul.
Hillern, Wilhelmine von
German fiction -- Translations into English
Happiness, pure and unspeakable, descended into her soul from the
sparkling canopy of night This was her holiday, her hour of
enfranchisement from the fetters of toil and study. She was alone
beneath the starry sky,--a lone watcher, while all around were
sleeping,--thinking while others were unconscious. She seemed to
herself appointed to keep guard over the dignity of humanity, while all
beside were sunk in slumber. She could rest only when others were
roused to consciousness. The fever of night, that brings remorse to so
many tossing upon restless couches, never assailed her. All earthly
phantoms recede from the heart bathed in starlight, for in that light
there is peace. In view of immensity, eternity is revealed to us, and
every earthly pain vanishes like a shadow before it. But when star
after star faded, and the moon had paled, the first rosy streak of dawn
kissed a brow pale as snow, and a weariness as of death assailed her.
The sacred fire of her soul had devoured her bodily strength and was
extinguished with it. Then she sank to rest silently and
uncomplainingly, like the lamps of night at the approach of day. So it
was at this hour. As the darkness vanished, she descended to her
apartments, and sought in brief repose the strength that would suffice
for a day of constant labour.
"The more time I spend in sleep, the less of life do I enjoy," she said
in answer to the remonstrances of her anxious attendant. "Everything in
the world is so beautiful that we should not lose one moment of it,--so
short a time is ours to enjoy it."
"Enjoy! Good heavens! What do you enjoy? you do nothing but work."
"That is my enjoyment, my good Willmers. For my work is nothing less
than the constant study and discovery of the beauties of the world. An
immortality would not suffice to enjoy it all,--and what can we
accomplish in our brief span of existence? Shall we curtail it by
sleep? Has not nature, who gives us eighty years of life, robbed us of
almost half of it by imposing upon us the necessity of spending from
seven to nine hours out of the twenty-four in a state of
unconsciousness? I will defy her as long as I can, and maintain my
right to enjoy her gift as I please, and not as she please."
Frau Willmers looked with intense anxiety at the pale cheeks of the
speaker. As she lay in her bed, white as the snowy draperies around
her, her thin hands fallen wearied upon the coverlet, her breath coming
short and quick, the faithful servant's heart misgave her; for she saw
that nature had already begun to revenge herself for the disobedience
of her laws. She covered her up carefully in the soft coverlet. "Do not
talk any more, my dear Fräulein von Hartwich,--you are worn out."
"And you are wearied too, my good Willmers. Why do you rise whenever
you hear me going to bed?"
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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