Only a Girl: or, A Physician for the Soul.Hillern, Wilhelmine von
General
Only a Girl: or, A Physician for the Soul.
Hillern, Wilhelmine von
German fiction -- Translations into English
Her father, Alexei Fedorowitsch, was a poor and uneducated noble, who
had distinguished himself by his bravery in the war with Napoleon, and,
invalided at its close, retired to his small estate in the country,
where he lived upon his pension. His wife, a sickly aristocrat, who had
condescended to marry him for want of a more desirable _parti_, was the
torment of his life. In despair at the trouble and annoyance caused by
his wife's delicate health, sensibility, and affectation, he made a
vow, when she bore him a daughter, to educate his child to be an utter
contrast to her mother. Better that the child should die than live to
be such an invalid as his wife. And he began by causing his little
daughter to be baptized, like the children of the poorest Russians in
that part of the country, in the icy waters of the Neva. The little
Feodorowna outlived her icy bath, and her entire education corresponded
with this beginning. Her mother died a few days after this cruel
baptism; anxiety for her child put the finishing stroke to her invalid
existence. And so her rude, uncultured father was her only guide and
instructor. He loved her after his fashion, and made her his companion
in all his amusements, riding, training horses, and the chase.
She was scarcely sixteen when he married her to a wealthy landed
proprietor in the neighbourhood, ruder and more illiterate even than
himself, and to the girl an object of aversion. As his wife, she lived
on his lonely estate like a serf. Her husband was cruel and suspicious,
and made her married life perfect torture. She was compelled to resign
her free habits of life, which she loved better than all else in the
world. Every extravagance, even the most harmless, was forbidden by her
husband. The joyous girl who had been used to fly upon the back of her
spirited steed over steppe and heath was not allowed to mount a horse,
but was made to sit with her maid-servants and spin by the dim light of
a train-oil lamp until her husband came home to compel, perhaps by the
_kantschu_, her reluctant attention to his wishes. She bore this
martyrdom for one year in silence. At last she made a confidant of a
neighbouring nobleman, and implored his aid in her great need; but she
found no sympathy,--no assistance. He called her a fool, who did not
appreciate her good fortune,--told her that to think of a divorce was a
crime, and that her husband was perfectly right. In her utter
loneliness, longing for love, if it were only the love of her old
father, a desire for freedom and hatred of her tormentor gained the
victory, and she fled, without taking anything with her but the few
clothes that she had possessed at her marriage. She travelled the
greater part of the way on foot, and arrived at her father's in such a
wretched condition that he was touched by compassion, received her
kindly, and took her part against her husband. Her suit for divorce
left her wholly without means, but free, and when shortly afterwards
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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