"O, certainly, I could not act otherwise," he said, rather absently. He
was scheming with desperate earnestness to meet and avert the impending
dangers. Annie's frank and cordial reception showed him that so far as
she was concerned he was as yet safe. But he knew her well enough to
feel sure that if she detected falsehood in him his case would be
nearly hopeless. He recognized that he was walking on a mine that at
any moment might be sprung. With his whole soul he loved Annie Walton,
and it would be worse than death to lose her. The thought of her had
made every gross temptation fall harmless at his feet, and even his
insatiate love of wealth had been mingled with the dearer hope that it
would eventually minister to her happiness. But he had lived so long in
the atmosphere of Wall Street that his ideas of commercial integrity
had become exceedingly blurred. When a questionable course opened by
which he could make money, he could not resist the temptation. He tried
to satisfy himself that business required such action, and called his
sharp practice by the fine names of skill, sagacity. But when on his
visits to Annie, which, of late, during the worst of his transactions,
had been frequent rather than prolonged, he had had a growing sense of
humiliation and fear. He saw that she could never be made to look upon
his affair with Burnett & Co. as he regarded it, and that her father
was the soul of commercial honor. Though Mr. Walton's fortune was
moderate, not a penny had come to him stained. After these visits
Hunting would go back to the city, resolved to quit everything
illegitimate and become in his business and other relations just what
he seemed to them. But some glittering temptation would assail him. He
would make one more adroit shuffle of the cards, and then, from being
hollow, would become morally and religiously sound at once.
During his voyage home, there was time for thought. A severe gale,
while lashing the sea into threatening waves, had also disturbed his
guilty conscience. He had amassed sufficient to satisfy even his greed
of gold for the present, and his calculating soul hinted that it was
time to begin to put away a little stock in heaven as well as on earth.
He resolved that he would withdraw from the whirlpool of Wall Street
speculation and engage in only legitimate operations. Moreover, he
began to long for the refuge and more quiet joys of home, and he felt,
as did poor Gregory, that Annie of all women could do most to make him
happy here and fit him for the future life. Therefore he had returned
with the purpose of pressing his suit for a speedy marriage as strongly
as a safe policy would permit.
The bright October day of his arrival in New York seemed emblematic of
his hopes and prospects, and now again the deepening night, the rising
wind, and the wildly hurrying clouds but mirrored back himself.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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