"We must carry out our old agreement," continued Annie. "We must be
close and lasting friends. You should not blame me for an attachment
formed years ago."
"I do not blame you."
"Then you should not punish me so severely. You first make your
friendship needful to me, and then you deny it."
"I am _your_ friend, and more."
"How can we enjoy a frank and happy friendship through coming years,
after--after--you feel differently from what you do now, when you will
not even hear the name of him who will one day be my second self?"
Again his face darkened; but she continued rapidly, "Mr. Hunting is
deeply grateful to you, and would like to express his feelings in
person. He wishes to bury the past--"
"He will, with me, soon," interrupted Gregory, gloomily.
"No; please do not speak in that way," she pleaded. "He wishes to make
what little return he can, and offers to watch with you night and day."
He turned upon her almost fiercely, and said, "Are you too in league
with my evil destiny, in that you continually persecute me with that
man? Miss Walton, I half doubt whether you know what love means, or you
would not make such a proposition. Let me at least die quietly. With
the memory of the past and the knowledge of the present, his presence
in my room would be death by torture. Pardon me, but let us end this
matter once for all. We have both been unfortunate, you in inspiring a
love that you cannot return; I in permitting my heart to go from me,
beyond recall, before learning that my passion would be hopeless. I do
not see that either of us has been to blame, you certainly not in the
slightest degree. But, however vain, my love is an actual fact, and I
cannot act as if it were not. As well might a man with a mortal wound
smile and say it's but a scratch. I cannot change my mind merely in
view of expedience and invest such feelings in another way. The fact of
my love is now a past disaster, and I must bear the consequences with
such fortitude as I can. But what you ask would drive me mad. If I
should live, possibly in the future I might meet you often without the
torturing regret I now feel. But to make a smiling member of Charles
Hunting's friendly circle would require on my part the baldest
hypocrisy; and I can't do it, and won't try. If that man comes into my
room, I will crawl out if I can."
He was trembling with excitement, his face flushed and feverish, and
his eyes unnaturally bright.
"And you banish me too," said Annie, hurt and alarmed at the same time.
"Yes, yes; forgive me for saying so. Yes; till I'm stronger. See how
I've spoken to you. I've no self-control."
She was most reluctant to go, and stood a moment, hesitating. Timidly
she ventured to quote the line:
"Earth has no sorrows that Heaven cannot cure."
"That's a comforting fact for those who are going there," he said,
coldly.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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