He paused dreamily. Dyce, still under the impulse of softened feelings,
spoke as he seldom did, very simply, quietly, sincerely.
"I believe, father, that I am not _un_fit for it. Politics, it's true,
don't interest me very strongly, but I have brains enough to get the
necessary knowledge, and I feel that I shall do better work in a
prominent position of that kind than if I went on tutoring or took to
journalism. As you say, we must have representatives, and I should not
be the least capable, or the least honest. I find I can speak fairly
well; I find I can inspire people with confidence in me. And, without
presumption, I don't think the confidence is misplaced."
"Well, that's something," said the vicar, absently. "But you talk as if
politics were a profession one could live by. I don't yet understand--"
"How I'm going to live. Nor do I. I'll tell you that frankly. But Lady
Ogram knows my circumstances, and none the less urges me on. It may be
taken for granted that she has something in view; and, after giving a
good deal of thought to the matter, I see no valid reason why I should
refuse any assistance she chooses to offer me. The case would not be
without precedent. There is nothing dishonourable--"
Dyce drifted into verbosity. At the beginning, he had lost from sight
the impossibility of telling the whole truth about his present position
and the prospects on which he counted; he spoke with relief, and would
gladly have gone on unbosoming himself. Strong and deep-rooted is the
instinct of confession. Unable to ease his conscience regarding outward
circumstances, he turned at length to the question of his intellectual
attitude.
"Do you remember, when I was here last, I spoke to you of a French book
I had been reading, a sociological work? As I told you, it had a great
influence on my mind. It helped to set my ideas in order. Before then,
I had only the vaguest way of thinking about political and social
questions. That book supplied me with a scientific principle, which I
have since been working out for myself."
"Ha!" interjected the vicar, looking up oddly. "And you really feel in
need of a scientific principle?"
"Without it, I should have remained a mere empiric, like the rest of
our politicians. I should have judged measures from the narrow, merely
practical point of view; or rather, I should pretty certainly have
guided myself by some theory in which I only tried to believe."
"So you have now a belief, Dyce? Come, that's a point to have reached.
That alone should give you a distinction among the aspiring men of
to-day. And _what_ do you believe?"
After drawing a meditative puff or two, Dyce launched into his familiar
demonstration. He would very much rather have left it aside; he felt
that he was not speaking as one genuinely convinced, and that his
father listened without serious interest. But the theory had all to be
gone through; he unwound it, like thread off a reel, rather
mechanically and heavily towards the end.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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