You carry the feelings of middle age, I said, in imagination, over into
the period of senility, and then reason and dream about it as if its
whole mode of being were like that of the earlier period of life. But
how many things there are in old age which you must live into if you
would expect to have any “realizing sense” of their significance! In the
first place, you have no coevals, or next to none. At fifty, your vessel
is stanch, and you are on deck with the rest, in all weathers. At sixty,
the vessel still floats, and you are in the cabin. At seventy, you, with
a few fellow-passengers, are on a raft. At eighty, you are on a spars to
which, possibly, one, or two, or three friends of about your own age are
still clinging. After that, you must expect soon to find yourself alone,
if you are still floating, with only a life-preserver to keep your old
white-bearded chin above the water.
Kindness? Yes, pitying kindness, which is a bitter sweet in which the
amiable ingredient can hardly be said to predominate. How pleasant do
you think it is to have an arm offered to you when you are walking on
a level surface, where there is no chance to trip? How agreeable do you
suppose it is to have your well-meaning friends shout and screech at
you, as if you were deaf as an adder, instead of only being, as you
insist, somewhat hard of hearing? I was a little over twenty years old
when I wrote the lines which some of you may have met with, for they
have been often reprinted:
The mossy marbles rest
On the lips that he has prest
In their bloom,
And the names he loved to hear
Have been carved for many a year
On the tomb.
The world was a garden to me then; it is a churchyard now.
“I thought you were one of those who looked upon old age cheerfully, and
welcomed it as a season of peace and contented enjoyment.”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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