Paradise Garden: The Satirical Narrative of a Great ExperimentGibbs, George
General
Paradise Garden: The Satirical Narrative of a Great Experiment
Gibbs, George
Man-woman relationships -- Fiction; Satire
"Jerry fingered the thing and lighted it as though it might have been
the match of a blunderbuss.
"'I've been wondering for a great many years, Mr. Benham, what you
could be like,' she went on in a tone which is more nearly described
as a purr than anything else. 'You know, our places up in Ulster
County are almost adjoining. At times I've been tempted to scale your
wall. It looked so very attractive from outside. But they told me you
kept a private banshee, trained to visit those you didn't like. You
don't, do you?'
"Jerry laughed. 'The nearest thing I've got to a banshee is my dog
Skookums. But he's blind in one eye and his teeth are gone, and he's
too lazy even to wag his tail. Besides I don't see why I should set
him on _you_!
"She laughed, showing a row of rather small but even teeth.
"'They say you don't like girls. Tell me it isn't so, Mr.
Ballard'--she appealed to me.
"I saw the way the wind was blowing but I chose to humor her.
"'I am sure he adores the very ground you walk on,' I said politely,
'especially when you look like a figure on an Etruscan amphora.'
"She smiled slowly. 'You _can_ say nice things, can't you, Mr.
Ballard? But that doesn't quite exculpate Mr. Benham.'
"'I'm sure,' said Jerry very gravely, 'that you're the most beautiful
creature I've ever seen!'
"Her fishing prospered. Her eyelashes lowered so that we both could
see how long they were and when she raised them again and looked at
Jerry her eyes were opened wide.
"'That is the greatest compliment I've ever received in my life,' she
said evenly. 'I hope you mean it, Mr. Benham.'
"'I shouldn't have said it if I didn't think so,' said Jerry quickly.
"Something in the positive way he spoke pleased her again for she
smiled bewitchingly, effacing me completely. I think we're going to be
very good friends,' she said, moving up on the divan a little nearer
to him. 'Of course, it takes more than the aesthetic appeal to bring
two sensible people together,' she murmured. 'It is not the eye which
must catch the reflection, but the mind. You've thought a good
deal--and studied? Men are so vapid nowadays.' She sighed. 'I hope
some day you will think I'm clever enough for you to talk to me about
things.'
"She was playing up to him, you see, I think that Jerry is the most
extraordinary male animal that has ambled into her vision this winter.
"'I'd be glad to. Of course you're different from anything I ever saw
before,' said Jerry. 'I've always thought of nature as the most
beautiful thing in the world. Now I seem to be just as sure that art
is.'
"That rather took her aback, but she didn't turn a hair.
"'You think all this--superfluous?'
"'Not superfluous, perhaps. Merely artificial.'
"'Am I artificial?'
"'Yes,' bluntly! 'I don't understand it at all. But it's singularly
effective. It's like night with only one star visible--'
"'The more visible,' I put in, 'for being Venus.'
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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