"Their BOOTS have richly earned their fame; Their SHOES have gained an envied name; What matters mud, however thick, When once your feet are shod by DICK, 13, CROSS CHEAPING." PILOSAGINE. The shades of night were falling fast, When on the word his eyes he cast-- That word which struck him with amaze-- Couched in the adverts' meant to praise. PILOSAGINE. Sleep from his eyelids fastly fled, As to himself he wondering said: "If it be true that I can buy What will produce a beard, I'll try PILOSAGINE." * * * * * "Tempt not the trash," in tones full rough, His father urged, "Like other stuff That you have oft and often tried 'Tis sure to prove." The youth replied, "PILOSAGINE." PILOSAGINE at once applied, The wished-for three for which he sighed, Imperial, beard, moustache, soon felt; And thankful is he that e'er he spelt PILOSAGINE. * * * * * I. The drizzling rain was falling fast, As thro' the streets of London passed A youth who bore a neat and nice Umbrella with the strange device, "THE IMPERCEPTIBLE." II. His step was firm, erect his form, As heedless of the gathering storm He homeward hied with dauntless mien Beneath that elemental screen-- "THE IMPERCEPTIBLE." III. He saw umbrellas creased and torn, By wet and angry persons borne, And sorrowing o'er their wretched plight, He pitied those who lacked that night "THE IMPERCEPTIBLE." IV. "Best try a cab," an old friend said; "Dark lowers the tempest overhead. The rain will faster fall anon;" But still that youth relied upon "THE IMPERCEPTIBLE." V. "O stay," a maiden said, "I'd fain Ask a brief shelter from the rain." The astonished youth gazed at the fair, And gently answered, "You may share, "THE IMPERCEPTIBLE." * * * * * OZOKERIT. (_By a Long-way-after-a-Fellow-Poet._) The shades of night were falling fast, When through a western suburb passed A man who bore upon his back A placard, with this word in black-- "OZOKERIT." His brow was dark, his eye beneath Gleamed like a lantern o'er his teeth, Which gnashing ceaselessly he sung That fragment of an unknown tongue-- "OZOKERIT." In humble homes he saw the light Of candles--if anything less bright Above, the glimmering gas lamps shone, The contrast wrung from him a groan. "OZOKERIT."