"Speak! speak! thou fearful guest! Who, with thy hollow breast Still in rude armour drest, Comest to daunt me! Wrapt not in Eastern balms, But with thy fleshless palms Stretched, as if asking alms, Why dost thou haunt me?" its metre was admirably imitated by the late C. S. Calverley, in his ODE TO TOBACCO. Thou who, when fears attack Bidst them avaunt, and Black Care, at the horseman's back, Perching, unseatest; Sweet when the morn is grey; Sweet when they've cleared away Lunch, and at close of day Possibly sweetest. I have a liking old For thee, though manifold Stories, I know are told, Not to thy credit. * * * * * Cats may have had their goose Cooked by tobacco juice; Still why deny its use Thoughtfully taken? We're not as tabbies are: Smith take a fresh cigar! Jones, the tobacco jar! Here's to thee, Bacon! From C. S. Calverley's _Verses and Translations_ (George Bell and Sons). * * * * * THE DERBY WEEK. (_A Long Way After a Longfellow._) Oh, Derby week, oh, Derby week, how precious are thy pleasures! Not hymned alone in summer-time With hoarse enthusiastic rhyme, Oh, Derby week, oh, Derby week, but hailed in pewtern measures! Oh, Derby week, oh, Derby week, how coarse the cads who "put on" Their three half-crowns for Insulaire, Or intimate Sir Joseph's "square." Oh, Derby week, oh, Derby week--as if I cared a button! Saturnian feasts, Saturnian feasts, you ape, despite Dame Grundy. We laugh until the dread bell rings, But oh, the aches to-morrow brings, And Derby week, and Derby week, that reckoning on the Monday! The welsher's book, the welsher's book, is mirror of thy glories: It's ready when _their_ horse comes in, But somewhat muddled when _you_ win. The welsher's book, the welsher's book, whips Black's in point of stories! So Derby week, oh, Derby week, your usual style, we think, errs, In ending in too cheerful nights, Headaches and debts, green veils and fights, And Derby week, oh, Derby week, Dutch dolls and British drinkers. _Funny Folks_, June 8, 1878. * * * * * The following are parodies of the "Saga of King Olaf," contained in Longfellow's "Tales of a Wayside Inn":-- QUEEN SIGRID THE HAUGHTY. (_A Longfellow Cut Short._)