I REMEMBER, I remember, When I was a little Boy, One fine morning in September, Uncle brought me home a toy. I remember how he patted Both my cheeks with kindliest mood; "Then," said he, "you little fat head, There's a top because you're good." Grandmamma--a shrewd observer-- I remember gazed upon My new top, and said with fervour, "Oh! how kind of Uncle John!" While mamma, my form caressing,-- In her eye the tear-drop stood, Read me this fine moral lesson, "See what comes of being good!" I remember, I remember, On a wet and windy day. One cold morning in December, I stole out and went to play; I remember Billy Hawkins Came, and with his pewter squirt, Squibb'd my pantaloons and stockings, Till they were all over dirt! To my mother for protection I ran quaking every limb. She exclaim'd, with fond affection, "Gracious goodness! look at _him!_" Pa cried when he saw my garment-- 'Twas a newly-purchased dress-- "Oh! you nasty little _Warment_, How came you in such a mess?" Then he caught me by the collar-- Cruel only to be kind-- And to my exceeding dolour, Gave me several slaps behind. Grandmamma, while yet I smarted, As she saw my evil plight, Said--'twas rather stony-hearted-- "Little rascal! sarve him right!" I remember, I remember, From that sad and solemn day, Never more in dark December Did I venture out to play. And the moral which they taught, I Well remember; thus they said-- "Little boys, when they are naughty, Must be whipped, and sent to bed!" _The Ingoldsby Legends._ * * * * * A correspondent, writing to _Notes and Queries_ as far back as June 10, 1871, mentions a parody, of which, unfortunately, only the two verses following are given:-- "I remember, I remember, The day that I was born, When first I saw this breathing world, All naked and forlorn. They wrapped me in a linen cloth, And then in one of frieze; And tho' I could not speak just then, Yet I contrived to sneeze. "I remember, I remember, Old ladies came from far; Some said I was like mother dear, But others thought like _par;_ Yet all agreed I had a head, And most expressive eyes; The latter were about as large As plums in Christmas pies." UNEDA. Philadelphia. * * * * * A REMINISCENCE. I remember, I remember, The cell, which now I scorn. The little window where no sun Could cheer the dreary morn. Policeman X. no wink too soon, Brought in my musty fare, And, growling as he went away, Locked me in safely there!