THE BURIAL OF THE BILLS. (_A Parody apropos to present circumstances, August_, 1884.) Not a joke was heard, not a troublesome vote, As the bills into limbo they hurried; Not e'en INGLIS discharged a farewell shot, O'er the grave where the Jew-Bill was buried. They buried them darkly at dead of night, For bed all the members yearning; With the aid of the Speaker to keep them right, And GREEN'S parliamentary learning. No vain discussion their life supprest, Nor did truth nor talk confound them; They passed a few, and as for the rest, They burked them just as they found them. For most of the Session's task was done, The supplies marked the hour for retiring; And as August drew near, each son of a gun, At the grouse, in his dreams, was a-firing. * * * * * So they settled the Bills--other folks' and their own-- Never destined to figure in story; They shed not a tear, and they heaved not a groan, But they burked them alike, Whig and Tory! _Punch_, 1850. * * * * * A TALE OF A TUB. Not a cackle was heard, or matitudinal crow, As the cask to the orchard they barrowed; And gently and tenderly laid him below, Where some ground had been recently harrowed. The tears trickled slowly down Emma's fair check, While Ned sobbed aloud in his fustian, And Marian's feelings forbade her to speak For fear of spontaneous combustion. They gazed on his coat of cerulean blue, Ana silently gauged his dimensions, Then covered him up with a hurdle or two To balk the sly foxes' intentions. Then slowly and sadly they turned them away, With their hearts overladen with sorrow: Said Emma, "Bedad! he is safe for to-day." Said Ned, "We must tap him to-morrow." Alas! Ere the dawn of another to-day, There only was weeping and wailing; That beautiful tub had been carried away, Or had leaked through a gap in the pailing. And the Beaks, when applied to, just wagged their old heads, And said, "Since for advice you must ask us," Don't bury your casks in your strawberry beds, Lest men take them by _Habeas Caskus!_" JOHN E. ALLEN. (The touching incident described in these affecting lines occurred to some friends who, for fear of an explosion, buried a cask of paraffine oil in their garden; a midnight robber despoiled them of their spirit, and they could not make light of it.) * * * * * Alfred, Lord Tennyson. POET LAUREATE.