So I will go down early, you come down after, Herbie dear; To-morrow may be the saddest day of this our sad fifth year. I've felt some twinges sometimes of conscience and of gout; But the painfullest of all would be to know that we're turned out. _The Evening News_, February 18, 1884. * * * * * THE NEW LORD MAYOR. (_A long way after Tennyson_). You must mind and call me early, call me early, JOHN, d'ye hear. To-morrow'll be the nobbiest day of all this blessed year: Of all this wonderful year, JOHN, the scrumptiousest I declare, For I'm to be made Lord Mayor, JOHN! I'm to be made Lord Mayor! There's many an Aldermanic Swell, but none so great as me; I scorn your Common Councillors, such men I will not see; But none so grand as Alderman ELLIS the Liverymen all swear, For I'm to be made Lord Mayor, JOHN! I'm to be made Lord Mayor! I sleep well after a heavy meal, and I shall never wake, If you don't knock at my door, JOHN, when day begins to break; And I must dress in my Sunday clothes, and titivate up my hair, For I'm to be made Lord Mayor, JOHN, I'm to be made Lord Mayor! As I came up to the Mansion House, whom think ye I should see, But FIGGINS and other Aldermen as glum as they well could be, They thought of the coming pageantry, and how I should swagger there, For I'm to be made Lord Mayor, JOHN, I'm to be made Lord Mayor! Then mind and call me early, call me early, JOHN, don't fear To dig me in my illustrious ribs, and shout in my lordly ear; And to-morrow will see me roll along, while all the people stare, For I'm to be made Lord Mayor, JOHN! I'm to be made Lord Mayor! _Punch_, November 12, 1881. * * * * * THE LORD MAYOR TO THE LADY MAYORESS. ["If this bill becomes law, it will be our proud privilege to continue the existence of the Lord Mayor for six months, until it comes into action on the 1st of May, 1885."--_Sir W. V. Harcourt's Speech._] If you've read Sir Vernon's speech upon the City, daughter dear, You will see that London's downfall from its great estate is near; But one comfort you will gather--not November ends our sway, For I'm to be Mayor till May, daughter, I'm to be Mayor till May! I have said that I will fight the bill, in clause, and line, and word. I may not be the conqueror, but my protests shall be heard-- Though that clause my office to extend for six months more may stay, That I may be Mayor till May, daughter, I may be Mayor till May! They do not stop our banqueting, so that clause I don't condemn-- Oh, the Ministers won't abrogate the feeds we give to them! And that is about the only good they do not take away-- But I'm to be Mayor till May, daughter, I'm to be Mayor till May! * * * * *