Yet though the task may patience ask, We’re here convened to try it, O! To see if schools will root out fools, Or crime be cured by diet, O! _Hey for social science, &c._ The blood-red sun had scarce begun To shine out strong and hearty, O! When up we rose and donned our clo’es To join Bell’s breakfast-party, O! _Hey for social science, &c._ Delicious doles of meat and rolls Disposed to mirth and laughter, O! The inspiring tea brought out Macnee, And others followed after, O! _Hey for social science, &c._ When hunger’s rage we thus assuage, Succeeds the thirst for knowledge, O! Then, horse and foot, we take the _route_, And hurry to the college, O! _Hey for social science, &c._ Here in we press for some address That lasts two hours or longer, O! And if a word is seldom heard, The applause is all the stronger, O! _Hey for social science, &c._ The section meetings next we try, Some worse and others better, O! But if the days are somewhat dry, The nights will prove the wetter, O! _Hey for social science, &c._ That sense alone conspicious shone I can’t declare in conscience, O! But great’s the use to introduce A safety-valve for nonsense, O! _Hey for social science, &c._ A few who well their tale could tell Did ably fill the rostrums, O! While many a goose his clack let loose, And quacks proclaimed their nostrums, O! _Hey for social science, &c._ Just ere the welcome hour of six We gladly cut our cable, O! And in some port of refuge fix, Hard by a well spread table, O! _Hey for social science, &c._ While all things good in drink and food Our weary souls are cheering, O! The ills of life, before so rife, Seem quickly disappearing, O! _Hey for social science, &c._ Around us eyes and faces bright Our softened hearts are winning, O! Fair matrons in meridian light, And morning stars beginning, O! _Hey for social science, O!_ _The best of social science, O!_ _Is when its power, in hall or bower,_ _To Beauty we affiance, O!_ With ardour fired, by love inspired, I rise and give “The Ladies,” O! And they who shrink the toast to drink May hang and go to Hades, O! _Hey for social science, &c._ We talk, we quaff, we sing and laugh, Then part with tears and sighing, O! And when at last the week is past We’re dead with mirth――or dying, O! _Hey for social science, &c._ But I ordain that soon again, These pleasant hours repeating, O! We learn some more of social lore At such an evening meeting, O!