_Woo’d and married ah’ a’; Married and woo’d an’ a’: I’ve shown you a dodge to avoid Being woo’d and married an’ a’._ A third way of tying the tether, Which sometimes may happen to suit, Is living a good while together, And getting a married repute. But you who are here as a stranger, And don’t mean to stay with us long, Are little exposed to that danger, So here I may finish my song. _Woo’d and married an’ a’; Married and woo’d an’ a’: You’re taught now to seek or to shun Being woo’d and married an’ a’._ CHARLES, LORD NEAVES. ――――:o:―――― PROMISE AND PERFORMANCE.[44] AIR――“_Charley is my darling._” Charley was so daring, so daring, so daring, Charley was so daring, yet somehow durstn’t fight; For Cronstadt looked so scaring, so scaring, so scaring, Cronstadt looked so scaring, it frightened him outright. Its forts he vowed he’d shatter, he’d shatter, he’d shatter, The forts he swore he’d shatter, no stone of them should stand: But this was merely chatter, mere after-dinner chatter, He changed his note when soberly the stones themselves he scanned. “Your cutlasses prepare boys, prepare boys, prepare boys, For victory depends upon the sharpness of your fire; But at Cronstadt we’ll but stare boys, but stare boys, but stare boys, Then home again in safety all right gallantly retire. And if they ask us why, boys, our strength we didn’t try, boys, ’Stead of taking it for granted if we fought that we’d be beat; ’Twas the fault of Jimmy Graham, the swab (I’d like to flay him!) Who with boys and with old women had manned our precious fleet.” And now the War is over, Sir Charley’s turned a rover, And arm in arm with Constantine inside the forts has seen; And he swears ’twas deuced lucky he more prudent was than plucky, Or sunk and smashed and shattered every ship of his had been! Now with all respect for Charley, who did his work so rarely, _Punch_ holds that British oak’s as tough as ’twas in Dibdin’s day; And _Punch_ states without shrinking, he’s not alone in thinking, That a Nelson would have taken where a Napier turned away. _Punch_, November 29, 1856. ――――:o:―――― THE MANAGER TO MRS. LANGTRY. AIR――“_Oh, Nanny, wilt thou gang wi’ me?_”