The Proctors came up in their shining bands, And they asked them their names, and they sent them down. And their mothers are weeping and wringing their hands, For those who will never come back to the town. For men go to grief, and their mothers must pay, And the sooner its over the better for they; So good-bye to the Dons and their moaning. DUNS SCOTUS. _College Rhymes_, 1865. T. and G. Shrimpton, Oxford. ―――― THE THREE FELLAHS. Three fellahs went out to a house in the west, To a ball in the west as the sun went down; Each thought how the women would like his new vest, And the street-boys stood chaffing them walking thro’ town. For men must flirt, and women will weep If they can’t get a husband whose pocket is deep, Though they don’t tell Pa what’s owing. Three girls sat dressed to the best of their power, And they trimmed their hair as the sun went down; They thought of the ball, and they looked at the hour, And the carriage came rolling up――coachman in brown―― For men must flirt, and women will weep If they can’t get a husband whose pocket is deep, Though they don’t tell Pa what’s owing, Three swells are tied firmly in wedlock’s bands, In the morning gleam as the ’bus went down; And the women are laughing and shaking the hands Of those who without them will ne’er leave the town. But men should mind, and women are deep, And the richer the husband the harder to weep, And good-bye to the swells and their groaning. _Judy_, September 4, 1867. ―――― THREE HUSBANDS. Three husbands went forth from their homes in the West―― From their homes in the West to the City went down, Each thought on the woman whom he loved best, And said “shall I bring her to-night a gown?” For men must work and women must dress, Though it sometimes comes hard on the husband, I guess, And gives rise to much grief and moaning. Three wives sat up in a lady’s bower, And each trimmed the dress that was brought from town, Fixing here a ribbon, and there a flower; And said one “’Twill look well trimmed with Bismarck brown,” For men must work that women may dress, And if it comes hard on the husbands I guess It is not the least use their moaning. Three husbands stood at the bankruptcy bar―― At the bankruptcy bar and their heads hung down, For creditors pressing for dividends are And three white-washed men will go forth to the town. For if men must work that women may dress, The former sometimes find themselves in a mess, Which gives rise to tears and much moaning.