―――― MEET ME THIS EVENING ALONE. Meet me this evening alone, Friend Bite, and we’ll hatch up a tale; We’ll chat when the day’s work is done, O’er a pipe and a jug of good ale: A plate of cold meat and some bread, With salad or cucumbers green, And part of a sucking pig’s head ’Tis the loveliest of tit-bits e’er seen. Then meet me &c. Pastry may do for the gay, The thoughtless, the young, and the free, But there’s something in cold beef, they say, More tempting to you and to me; Then remember, be sure to be there, If good eating and drinking you prize, You’ve liv’d the last fortnight on air, I can tell by those hollow-sunk eyes. Then meet me, &c. From _Wiseheart’s New Comic Songster_. Dublin. ―――― Many years ago (it was in February, 1844), _Punch_ had a parody entitled “Meet me with Wimbush alone,” alluding to Wimbush’s omnibus, which then ran from Belgrave Square to the Bank. It was jocularly reported never to carry more than one passenger at a time. But the following parody, from the same source, is not only more modern, but also more likely to appeal to the present generation, than a satire on a long forgotten omnibus:―― RED HERRINGS. Meet me at breakfast alone, And then I will give you a dish Which really deserves to be known, Though it’s not the genteelest of fish. You must promise to come, for I said A splendid red Herring I’d buy―― Nay, turn not away your proud head; You’ll like it, I know, when you try. If moisture the Herring betray, Drain, till from moisture ’tis free; Warm it through in the usual way, Then serve it for you and for me. A piece of cold butter prepare, To rub it when ready it lies; Egg sauce and potatoes don’t spare, And the flavour will cause you surprise. _Punch._ ―――― PARODIES OF “WHERE ARE YOU GOING TO, MY PRETTY MAID?” Miss Emily Faithful’s paper was responsible for the following:――We saw a Christmas card the other day which had been sent to a young lady at a school of design. It represented a grotesque figure at a lecturer’s desk, and underneath were these lines: “Where are you going to, my pretty maid?” “I’m going to lecture, sir,” she said. “And what is the subject, my pretty maid?” “Total extinction of man,” she said. “Then nobody’ll marry you, my pretty maid.” “Advanced women _don’t_ marry, good sir,” she said. March 1, 1879. ―――― VENUS AND ADONIS.