_Chorus._――Of the Special Correspondent, all of the modern time! When incidents are dull or few, he’ll reckless lies invent, Or he’ll date his telegrams from towns to which he never went; To vilify a famous man he’ll readily consent, And will act on orders sent from home to any base extent. _Chorus._――Will this Special Correspondent, all of the modern time! He loves to don a uniform and swagger with the best, And when no English are about wears medals on his chest; And for the news he cables home attention to arrest, That British troops are cowardly curs he glibly will suggest. _Chorus._――Will this Special Correspondent, all of the modern time! He has an altogether strange and wondrous sense of sight, For he can see a brilliant moon upon a moonless night; And has been known the lowest types of passion to excite, By writing of a fabulous “Baboon and Potboy” fight.[18] _Chorus._――Has this Special Correspondent, all of the modern time! “Untamed and ancient Savages” he also can espy, And many other curious sights――if no one else be nigh! But, if he should have company, why, then, his magic eye No longer non-existent moons and mortals can descry. _Chorus._――For this Special Correspondent, all of the modern time! When brought to mix with gentlemen, he acts in such a way, That they are bound to rid themselves of him without delay; For he toadies to gain confidence, which straightway he’ll betray; And there’s no trick too mean for him to readily essay. _Chorus._――This Special Correspondent, one of the modern time! In short, he’s arrogant and false; he gushes to excess, He makes his facts to suit the views his master may express; His self-conceit’s contemptible, so are his style and dress, And he’s brought already quite enough dishonour on the Press. _Chorus._――Has the Special Correspondent, all of the modern time! _Truth Christmas Number._ 1882. ―――― THE FINE YOUNG AGRICULTURIST. The winter comes, as winter came some fifty years ago―― Sometimes muggy, warm, and wet, and sometimes frost and snow; And, weather notwithstanding, comes the Christmas Cattle Show; But the modern English farmer our forefathers wouldn’t know, In the fine Young Agriculturist――one of the modern time.