Christian fiction; Medical fiction; Scotland -- Fiction; Surgeons -- Fiction; Wingfold, Thomas (Fictitious character) -- Fiction
"I don't wonder at that, the church is so little of a friend to
herself," interrupted the curate, relieved to find her so composed, for
as he came along he had dreaded something terrible.
"He wants very much to see you. He thinks perhaps you may be able to
help him. I am sure if you can't nobody can. But please don't heed much
what he says about himself. He is feverish and excited. There is such a
thing--is there not?--as a morbid humility? I don't mean a false
humility, but one that passes over into a kind of self disgust."
"I know what you mean," answered the curate, laying down his hat: he
never took his hat into a sick-room.
Dorothy led the way up the narrow creaking stairs.
It was a lowly little chamber in which the once popular preacher
lay--not so good as that he had occupied when a boy, two stories above
his father's shop. That shop had been a thorn in his spirit in the days
of his worldly success, but again and again this morning he had been
remembering it as a very haven of comfort and peace. He almost forgot
himself into a dream of it once; for one blessed moment, through the
upper half of the window he saw the snow falling in the street, while he
sat inside and half under the counter, reading Robinson Crusoe! Could
any thing short of heaven be so comfortable?
As the curate stepped in, a grizzled head turned toward him a haggard
face with dry, bloodshot eyes, and a long hand came from the bed to
greet him.
"Ah, Mr. Wingfold!" cried the minister, "God has forsaken me. If He had
only forgotten me, I could have borne that, I think; for, as Job says,
the time would have come when He would have had a desire to the work of
His hands. But He has turned His back upon me, and taken His free Spirit
from me. He has ceased to take His own way, to do His will with me, and
has given me my way and my will. Sit down, Mr. Wingfold. You can not
comfort me, but you are a true servant of God, and I will tell you my
sorrow. I am no friend to the church, as you know, but--"
"So long as you are a friend of its Head, that goes for little with me,"
said the curate. "But if you will allow me, I should like to say just
one word on the matter."
He wished to try what a diversion of thought might do; not that he
foolishly desired to make him forget his trouble, but that he knew from
experience any gap might let in comfort.
"Say on, Mr. Wingfold. I am a worm and no man."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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