So he insisted upon entering his name upon the register at the Harbor
Hotel. Where he would sleep was another matter. He was not hungry. He
never was after a spree, and the brandy kept him up. Going down at last
upon the sands he sat a long time on a bench under a willow tree,
watching the fishing boats as they went by, homeward bound to Still
Harbor; watching the sun as it went down in the West; watching the
groups of young people sauntering on the beach to his right and left,
straining his eyes to see if perchance _she_ was there with them; then
cursing himself for a fool to care whether she were there or not, and
taking a drink of brandy when he felt himself growing faint and dizzy.
Finally he fell asleep and dreamed he was a boy again, playing with Paul
in the smuggler’s room at the Ralston House, and worrying Miss Hansford.
He stole the melon a second time, and a second time lay under the clump
of scrub oaks and dreamed that he was dead. When he awoke the lights in
the city were out. The water in front of him was black, except where the
stars were reflected in it. His clothes were wet with the heavy dew; he
was cold and hungry and sober. It was not very far to a small hotel he
knew, and, taking his hand-bag, he made his way to it along the shore.
The drowsy clerk whom he roused from sleep was not very cheerful in his
greeting, and made some profane remarks about disturbing a feller that
time of night, and gave him an inferior room on the third floor back.
Jack didn’t care. It was all of a piece with the rest of his reception,
and he accepted it as his due. The night was hot, his room close, and,
taking off his coat and vest, he sat a while by the window, trying to
catch a breath of fresh air and wishing so much for a sight of the
cottage pictured so distinctly in his mind. It was the opposite side of
the hotel,—away from his range of vision. He could not see it, and if he
left in the morning, as he now meant to do, instead of waiting till
Monday, he might not see it at all; but he could write. Strange he had
not thought of that; he could write, and then good-bye forever to
everybody he had ever seen or heard of. He had material in his satchel,
and by the dim light of his kerosene lamp he began a letter which was to
be read with blinding tears, and which made his own come occasionally as
he pitied himself for what he was and where he was and what had brought
him there.
The dawn was breaking when his letter was ended, and he could discern
the outlines of many houses on the Heights. Conspicuous among them was
the Ralston House. Jack looked at it awhile,—then shook his fist and
swore at it as the home of Paul Ralston, his prospective brother-in-law,
who did not want him at the wedding.
“Well, I shan’t be there,” he said, folding his letter, and placing it
in an envelope, but forgetting to direct it.
His mind was confused with loss of sleep and his long fast.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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