Atonement -- Fiction; Clergy -- England -- Fiction; Illegitimate children -- Fiction
"It seems to me that the witnesses called by the police have between
them produced but three points of any weight against me, or worthy of
the serious consideration of this or any other court of law. I will
take these three points in their proper order, and will give my answer
to each in the fewest possible words in which I can express my meaning
to your worships.
"Arthur Busby has sworn that on the morning before the fire I ordered
him to fill the lamps with paraffin, though it was extremely unlikely
that any artificial light would be required in church next evening. But
on the man's own showing he was wearying and distressing me beyond
measure at the time--a more terrible time than this!" cried Carlton from
his heart; and was brought to pause, not for effect (though the effect
was marked) but by the very suddenness of his emotion. "And on the man's
own showing," he continued in a lower key, "he had once omitted this
important duty of filling the lamps, and I was 'for ever at him' on the
subject. What more natural than to tell him to go away and fill his
lamps, as one had told him a dozen times before, but this time without
thinking and simply to get rid of the man? On the other hand, if the
paraffin had been wanted for the felonious purpose suggested, could
anything be more incriminating and incredible than the suggested method
of obtaining it? I submit these two questions, with the highly important
point involved, to the consideration of the bench; and I do so with some
confidence.
"The next point, I confess, is more difficult to dismiss. I shall not
attempt to dismiss it from any mind in court. I shall simply leave it to
the consideration of your worships as men of the world and students of
the human heart. It is near midnight. I am not to be found at the
rectory, and a light is seen in the church. I admit that I was in the
church, and that I lighted one of the lamps.
"Here I am forced to allude to another matter: a matter in which, God
knows, I have never denied my guilt, as I do deny my guilt of the crime
of arson: a matter in which I have never sought to defend myself, as I
have been compelled to do in this court for a very long day and a half.
"Consider my case on the night of the fire. I will not dwell upon it; it
is surely within the knowledge or the imagination of most present. . . .
There was my church. I had held my last service there. I felt that I
could never hold another. And, whatever I had been, I loved my church!
You upon the bench . . . you Members of Christ's Church . . . I ask not
for your sympathy but for your insight. Can you think that I went into
the church I loved, wilfully and deliberately to burn it to the ground?
Can you not conceive my going there, in the dead of that dreadful night,
to look my last upon it--to bid my church good-bye?"
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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