Peradventure; or, The Silence of GodKeable, Robert
Religion
Peradventure; or, The Silence of God
Keable, Robert
Church of England -- Fiction; Religion -- Fiction; Young men -- Fiction
Paul stood hesitatingly. He did not quite know what to do. The girl
called to him over her shoulder. "Sit down, will you," she said,
"anywhere."
He walked over to a couch by the window and sat down, looking out over
the gay garden to the Downs. Hollyhocks marched as an army with
banners in a bed beneath the window. Chanctonbury's crown, clear and
bright in the sunlight to-day, rose into the pale blue sky above.
"What a glorious window-seat," he said, with a little note of content
in his voice. She threw him a glance, but did not speak. She was
searching through the portfolio.
"I think," observed Paul meditatively, "I'm the luckiest man alive to
get a chance of a year here."
"Yes?"
"I can't make up my mind what to do, you see," he said.
"I should have thought there was absolutely no doubt."
"No?" queried Paul in genuine astonishment.
"Of course not. You've got to write great poetry."
"I've also got to live," said Paul, with a flicker of a smile.
"Naturally. What about it?"
"Well, I've got to earn money."
Ursula found what she was looking for. "Here it is," she said, coming
over to him.
And then, carrying on the conversation: "I think those of us who can
see and express things, ought to think first of that," she said.
"After all, one lives somehow."
But Paul hardly heard. He was staring at the little picture, and was
very silent.
She broke the silence. "Well, can you guess the poem?" she demanded.
"'Spent,'" he whispered, half to himself.
Her silence told him he was correct. It was the short thing, since
then slightly renamed and improved, that Tressor had, of all he had
written, praised superlatively. Of all he had written, but, as he
looked at this, astonishment welled up in him. "But this is not what I
wrote," he said.
It was a picture of dull-red angry sunset tones over a bare stony plain
and a dimly-outlined ragged track. A solitary figure of a man lay
there, just as he had stumbled forward and fallen at the last step.
The light glowed on his sunburnt nude back, his face in shadow; and on
one other object, for, some short way beyond him, was a dimly-seen
ruined shrine, with the statue of a god, half overthrown. The stone
effigy reeled insecurely against a broken pillar, and the glow of the
dying sun caught on its upcast face. The girl had copied some Greek
masterpiece, and there, in that lone waste, as if to mock the beaten
human figure, a regular, perfect, immobile brow and eyes and nose and
lips turned upwards to the sky. In the fallen man was life, beaten and
despairing, but life; in the fallen god was death, serene and lovely,
but death.
"This is not what I wrote," repeated Paul again.
"But you instantly named it."
"It alone, of the pieces in the book, fitted at all," he said.
"I suspect that was not all. I should not be in the least surprised if
you had more in your mind than you knew. Anyway, your spent day struck
me so."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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