She continued laughing until her cushion slipped from under her head.
She half rose to straighten it, and at that instant she caught a glimpse
of her face in the center silvered panel of the Venetian mirror. The cry
of horror that broke from her at that instant seemed part of her laugh.
It would not have occurred to anyone who might have heard it that it
was otherwise than consistent with the incongruity, so to speak, of
the existing elements of the scene. The hideous leer of the thing
with horns, looking down at the exquisite picture of the _fete
champetre_--the distorted features of the woman’s face in the center
of the ruby and emerald and sapphire of the Venetian mirror--the cry
of horror mixed with the laugh of the woman who mocked at religion and
honor and purity--all were consistently incongruous.
In another instant she was lying on the sofa with her face down to the
cushion, trying to forget all that she had seen in the mirror. She wept
her tears on the brocaded silk for half an hour, and then she slipped
from where she was lying till her knees were on the floor. With a hand
clutching each side of the cushion she got rid of her passion in prayer.
“Oh, God! God! keep him away from me! keep him away from me!” was her
prayer; and it was possibly the best that she could have uttered. “Keep
him away from me! keep him away from me! Don’t let my soul be lost! Keep
him away from me!”
When she struggled to her feet, at last, she stood in front of the
mirror once again.
She now saw a face purified of all passion by tears and prayer, where
she had seen the soulless face of a Pagan’s orgy.
She went upstairs to her bed and went asleep, thanking God that she had
had the strength to send him away; that she had had strength sufficient
to stand where she had stood in the room, silent, while he had put
his arms on her bare shoulders and kissed her on the mouth, saying
“Good-by.”
She felt that she had every reason to thank God for that strength, for
she knew that it had been given to her at that moment; it had not sprung
from within her own heart; her heart had been crying out to him, “Stay,
stay, stay!” her heart took no account of honor or purity or a husband.
Yes, she felt that the strength which had come to her at that moment had
been the especial gift of God, and she was thankful to God for it.
That consciousness of gratitude to God was her last sensation before
falling asleep; and, when morning came, her first sensation was that of
having a letter to write. Before she had breakfasted she had written her
letter and sent it to be posted.
This was the letter:
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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