"Ah, well, I must admit that her ladyship and our friend Goldtip here are doing their best to balance the account; but I have made it a principle through life never to be satisfied with anything short of my full money's worth; and I don't even feel now, if you make my election a certainty, that we shall be more than square." "What are your other principles besides that of getting your full money's worth?" said I, with a sneer, that was lost upon Bodwinkle. "High Tory," he replied, promptly. "None of your Liberal Conservatives for me this time--that did well enough last election." "But Stepton is an absolute Radical," said I. "Exactly: that is why he is so important. You see the fact is--here, Goldtip, explain our little game; it is all his idea, and he can put it better than me." I knew from the bold defiant way in which Spiffy raised his eyes to mine that his original and unscrupulous genius had conceived a _coup d'état_ of some kind, so I listened curiously. "I am going to stand for Shuffleborough, and it is I who want Sir John Stepton's vote and influence," he announced, calmly. "You!" said I, amazed; "what are you going to stand as? and who is going to pay your expenses?" "I am going to stand as an extreme Liberal, and Bodwinkle as a regular old Tory. He is going to pay my expenses. We are going to strike out an entirely new line, and have convictions. He can't come the Liberal Conservative this time, as one of the Liberals who is very popular has gone in rather extensively for the Moderate Conservatives. So there is nothing for it but to come forward as an out-and-out Tory, and put me up as a Radical; by these means we hope to floor both the fellows that are trying the trimming game. Of course I am not intended to come in--I only split the party." "But if you stand, one of the others will retire. Look at what has just happened at Westminster." "Then Bodwinkle starts his wife's cousin Tom--why, he is rich enough to keep all three Liberals in the field to fight him if necessary; and you are pluck to the backbone, aint you, old fellow?" and Spiffy slapped Bodwinkle on the back. "Perhaps you would like to see our addresses," he went on,--"here they are; I wrote them both. I shall issue mine first, and Bodwinkle's a day or two after." "May I take them home to read?" I asked. "Oh, certainly, and frame your own on their model if you like," said Spiffy, laughing; "they'll be the neatest thing out in addresses, I assure you." "Mr Goldtip, I wish you would exert yourself, instead of talking politics with Mr B.," said Mrs Bodwinkle, coming up; "there are all sorts of things to arrange, and I am sure I don't know who is to take who down to supper;" and Spiffy was carried away upon special service. "Good-night, Bodwinkle," said I; "your ball is a great success, but I am an early man, and hot rooms don't suit me. I understand the political situation thoroughly now, and without pledging myself to anything, will see what is to be done."