Picturesque Sketches of London, Past and PresentMiller, Thomas
Philosophy
Picturesque Sketches of London, Past and Present
Miller, Thomas
London (England) -- Description and travel
This relic of the past is, we understand, to be cleared of its dingy
covering--the accumulated dust and dirt of centuries--and thrown open to
the public: may it be done quickly! I find the following mention of
Guildhall and the Giants that stood therein at the time Ned Ward wrote
his _London Spy_. He says, "I entered [Guildhall] with as great
astonishment to see the Giants, as the Morocco ambassador did London
when he saw the snow fall. I asked my friend the meaning and design of
setting [up] those two lubberly preposterous figures; for I supposed
they had some peculiar end in it. 'Truly,' says my friend, 'I am wholly
ignorant of what they intended by them, unless they were set up to shew
the City what huge loobies their forefathers were, or else to frighten
stubborn apprentices into obedience; for the dread of appearing before
two such monstrous loggerheads will sooner reform their manners, or
would force them into a compliance with their master's will, than
carrying them before my Lord Mayor or the Chamberlain of London; for
some of them are as much frightened at the name of Gog and Magog as
little children are at the terrible sound of Raw-head and Bloody-bones.
"'Pray,' said I, 'what are yonder cluster of people doing, that seem as
busy as so many fools at the Royal-oak Lottery?'
"'Truly,' said my friend, 'you are something mistaken in your
comparison: if you had said knaves, you had hit it; for that is the
Sheriff's Court; and I must give them that character, that I never knew
one fool amongst them, though they have to do with a great many. All
those tongue-plodders who are chattering within the bar, are picking the
pockets of those that stand without. You may know the sufferers by their
pale faces: the passions of Hope, Fear, and Revenge have put them into
such disorder, that they are as easy to be distinguished in a crowd by
their looks, as an owl from a hawk, or a country esquire from a
town-sharper.'
"'He's a very comely gentlemen,' said I, 'that sits upon the bench, and
puts on so pleasing a countenance, as if, like a god, he viewed with
pleasure the fuss and discords of contending mortals, that fret and fume
beneath him.'
"My friend replied, 'He might well look merrily who sits the playing of
so many great games, and is sure always to be on the winning side. For
you must know,' says he, 'these courts are like public gaming-tables;
the steward's the box-keeper, and the clients the fools that are bubbled
out of their money.'
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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