Autobiographical fiction; Domestic fiction; Male authors -- Fiction; Men -- Fiction; Psychological fiction
My mother!--dearest mother!--God hath given me a sister, and unto thee a
daughter, and covered her with the world's extremest infamy and scorn,
that so I and thou--_thou_, my mother, mightest gloriously own her, and
acknowledge her, and,---- Nay, nay, groaned Pierre, never, never, could
such syllables be one instant tolerated by her. Then, high-up, and
towering, and all-forbidding before Pierre grew the before unthought of
wonderful edifice of his mother's immense pride;--her pride of birth,
her pride of affluence, her pride of purity, and all the pride of
high-born, refined, and wealthy Life, and all the Semiramian pride of
woman. Then he staggered back upon himself, and only found support in
himself. Then Pierre felt that deep in him lurked a divine
unidentifiableness, that owned no earthly kith or kin. Yet was this
feeling entirely lonesome, and orphan-like. Fain, then, for one moment,
would he have recalled the thousand sweet illusions of Life; tho'
purchased at the price of Life's Truth; so that once more he might not
feel himself driven out an infant Ishmael into the desert, with no
maternal Hagar to accompany and comfort him.
Still, were these emotions without prejudice to his own love for his
mother, and without the slightest bitterness respecting her; and, least
of all, there was no shallow disdain toward her of superior virtue. He
too plainly saw, that not his mother had made his mother; but the
Infinite Haughtiness had first fashioned her; and then the haughty world
had further molded her; nor had a haughty Ritual omitted to finish her.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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