_Esop._ What is't? _Beau._ I don't know the Name on't. _Esop._ You know the Business on't, I hope? _Beau._ That I do--the Business of it is----to----put in a Deputy and receive the Money. _Esop._----Pray, what may be your Name? _Beau._ Empty. _Esop._ Where do you live? _Beau._ In the Side-Box. _Esop._ What do you do there? _Beau._ I ogle the Ladies. _Esop._ To what Purpose? _Beau._ To no Purpose. _Esop._ Why then do you do it? _Beau._ Because they like it, and I like it. _Esop._ Wherein consists the Pleasure? _Beau._ In playing the Fool. _Esop._----Pray, Sir, what Age are you? _Beau._ Five and twenty my Body; my Head's about fifteen. _Esop._ Is your Father living? _Beau._ Dead, thank God. _Esop._ Has he been long so? _Beau._ Positively, yes. _Esop._ Where were you brought up? _Beau._ At School. _Esop._ What School? _Beau._ The School of _Venus_. _Esop._ Were you ever at the University? _Beau._ Yes. _Esop._ What Study did you follow there? _Beau._ My Bed-maker. _Esop._ How long did you stay? _Beau._ Till I had lost my Maidenhead. _Esop._ Why did you come away? _Beau._ Because I was expell'd. _Esop._ Where did you go then? _Beau._ To Court. _Esop._ Who took Care of your Education there? _Beau._ A Whore and a Dancing-Master. _Esop._ What did you gain by them? _Beau._ A _Minuet_, and the _Pox_. _Esop._ Have you an Estate? _Beau._ I had. _Esop._ What's become on't? _Beau._ Spent. _Esop._ In what? _Beau._ In a Twelvemonth. _Esop._ But how? _Beau._ Why, in Dressing, Drinking, Whoring, Claps, Dice, and Scriveners. What do you think of me now, old Gentleman? _Esop._ Pray, what do you think of yourself? _Beau._ I don't think at all: I know how to bestow my Time better. _Esop._ Are you married? _Beau._ No----have you ever a Daughter to bestow upon me? _Esop._ She wou'd be well bestow'd. _Beau._ Why, I'm a strong young Dog, you old Put, you: She may be worse coupled---- _Esop._ Have you then a Mind to a Wife, Sir? _Beau._ Yaw, _Mynheer_. _Esop._ What wou'd you do with her? _Beau._ Why, I'd take Care of her Affairs, rid her of all her Troubles, her Maidenhead, and her Portion. _Esop._ And, pray, what Sort of Wife wou'd you be willing to throw yourself away upon? _Beau._ Why, upon one that has Youth, Beauty, Quality, Virtue, Wit and Money. _Esop._ And how may you be qualified yourself, to back you in your Pretensions to such a one? _Beau._ Why, I am qualified with----a Perriwig----a Snuff-box--a Feather----a----smooth Face----a Fool's Head----and a Patch. _Esop._ But one Question more: What Settlements can you make? _Beau._ Settlements!--Why, if she be a very great Heiress, indeed, I believe I may settle----myself upon her for Life, and my Pox upon her Children for ever. _Esop._ 'Tis enough; you may expect I'll serve you, if it lies in my Way. But I wou'd not have you rely too much upon your Success, because People sometimes are mistaken---- As for Example----