Mr. _Barn._ Here, shew a room----or will you please to walk into the kitchen first, gentlemen, and see what you like for dinner. _1 Gen._ Make no preparations, Sir, your own dinner is sufficient. Mr. _Barn._ Very well, I understand ye; let's see, how many are there of ye? [_Tells 'em._] One, two, three, four: well, gentlemen, 'tis but half a crown a-piece for yourselves, and sixpence a-head for your servants; your dinner shall be ready in half an hour; here, shew the gentlemen into the _Apollo_. _2 Gen._ What, Sir, does your father keep an inn? Mr. _Barn._ The _Sword Royal_; at your service, Sir. _Dor._ But father let me speak to you; would you disgrace me? Mr. _Barn._ My wine is very good, gentlemen, but to be very plain with ye, it is dear. _Dor._ O, I shall run distracted. Mr. _Barn._ You seem not to like my house, gentlemen; you may try all the inns in the county, and not be better entertained; but I own my bills run high. _Dor._ Gentlemen, let me beg the favour of ye. _1 Gen._ Ay, my young _'Squire ~of the~ Sword Royal'_, you shall receive some favours from us. _Dor._ Dear Monsieur _le Guarantiere_. _1 Gen._ Here, my horse there. _Dor._ Monsieur _la Rose_. _2 Gen._ Damn ye, ye prig. _Dor._ Monsieur _Trofignac_. _3 Gen._ Go to the devil. [_Exeunt Gentlemen._ _Dor._ O, I'm disgrac'd for ever. Mr. _Barn._ Now, son, this will teach you how to live. _Dor._ Your son? I deny the kindred; I'm the son of a whore, and I'll burn your house about your ears, you old rogue you. [_Exit._ Mr. _Barn._ Ha, ha---- _Griff._ The young gentleman's in a passion. Mr. _Barn._ They're all gone for all that, and the _Sword Royal_'s the best general in Christendom. _Enter ~Erastus~'s servant, talking with ~Lisetta~._ _Lis._ What, that tall gentleman I saw in the garden with ye? _Serv._ The same, he's my master's uncle, and ranger of the king's forests----He intends to leave my master all he has. Mr. _Barn._ Don't I know this scoundrel? What, is his master here? What do you do here, rascal? _Serv._ I was asking which must be my master's chamber. Mr. _Barn._ Where is your master? _Serv._ Above stairs with your wife and daughter; and I want to know where he's to lie that I may put up his things. Mr. _Barn._ Do you so, rascal? _Serv._ A very handsome inn this--Here, drawer, fetch me a pint of wine. Mr. _Barn._ Take that, rascal, do you banter us? [_Kicks him out._ _Enter Mrs. ~Barnard~._ Mrs. _Barn._ What is the meaning of this, husband? Are not you asham'd to turn your house into an inn----and is this a dress for my spouse, and a man of your character? Mr. _Barn._ I'd rather wear this dress than be ruin'd.