“Precisely so, sir,” interrupted my visitor sarcastically. “You are really growing quite intelligent. If you keep on, doctor, you will be as good an intuitive diagnostician as we have in Chicago, and that’s saying much.” “Yes,” I replied with some confusion, “but you can’t expect a fellow to carry a divining rod about with him, and besides, your family is one of the highest respectability.” My young visitor sneered perceptibly and retorted: “Of course, you are like the rest of humanity, looking for respectability in high places and overlooking the pearls that lie imbedded in the mud of poverty and social mediocrity. I really feel inclined to lecture you, doctor, you seem so woefully stupid in some directions. Here you are, with abundant opportunities for study and observation of human nature, maundering of ‘respectability’ as a factor in diagnosis! Not but that it is a factor sometimes, but you don’t weigh the evidence just right. You are inclined to misconstrue social prominence as a factor in your diagnoses. Your interpretation of it is only too often precisely opposite to the truth. “Look at the childlessness of the average high-toned family--look at the character of the progeny of those who do have children, and then babble of ‘respectability!’ Faugh! doctor, you make me sick. For a scientific physician, you are the most innocent man I ever knew.” “Oh, come now,” I said, “I don’t pretend to know it all, but I am not quite so big a fool as you might suppose.” “Well, perhaps not--quite. There may be bigger chumps, but I dare say they are all practicing medicine.” “By the way,” he continued, “speaking of honoring one’s father, I can’t for the life of me see why a fellow should be expected to do that. Fathers are mere accidents in the scheme of nature. You see, anybody will answer for a father, but with your mother--well, that’s different. No other could fill her place. Most people think the male human is the important element in our social system, but that’s all rot. He is a secondary consideration, a mere incident, and should be given to understand it.” “Um-m ah!” I answered slowly, “I believe the truth is gradually dawning upon him. The new woman is--” “Great guns, doctor! Do you mean those things with breeches on, that ride bicycles, and play foot ball?” “Well, in a measure, yes,” I replied. “Come, come, doctor! I was talking about natural phenomena as involved in the perpetuation of the species; I had no thought of what biologists term sports in nature.” “Ah, that’s different, my boy,” I said, “unless you use the term ‘sport’ as a _double entendre_.” “I don’t think I quite understand you, doctor.” “Oh well, I suppose my play upon words was a little too commonplace for you,” I replied, meanwhile thinking that the Smith baby, was something of a chump himself. Not wishing to hurt his feelings, however, I held my peace, and he continued: