Friendship -- Fiction; Poor -- Fiction; Russia -- Social life and customs -- 1533-1917 -- Fiction
I had not asked your advice earlier for the reason that I wanted to
think the matter over alone. However, the decision which you have just
read is unalterable, and I am about to announce it to Bwikov himself,
who in any case has pressed me for a speedy reply, owing to the fact (so
he says) that his business will not wait nor allow him to remain here
longer, and that therefore, no trifle must be allowed to stand in its
way. God alone knows whether I shall be happy, but my fate is in His
holy, His inscrutable hand, and I have so decided. Bwikov is said to be
kind-hearted. He will at least respect me, and perhaps I shall be
able to return that respect. What more could be looked for from such a
marriage?
I have now told you all, Makar Alexievitch, and feel sure that you will
understand my despondency. Do not, however, try to divert me from my
intention, for all your efforts will be in vain. Think for a moment;
weigh in your heart for a moment all that has led me to take this step.
At first my anguish was extreme, but now I am quieter. What awaits me I
know not. What must be must be, and as God may send....
Bwikov has just arrived, so I am leaving this letter unfinished.
Otherwise I had much else to say to you. Bwikov is even now at the
door!...
September 23rd.
MY BELOVED BARBARA ALEXIEVNA,--I hasten to reply to you--I hasten to
express to you my extreme astonishment.... In passing, I may mention
that yesterday we buried poor Gorshkov.... Yes, Bwikov has acted nobly,
and you have no choice but to accept him. All things are in God’s hands.
This is so, and must always be so; and the purposes of the Divine
Creator are at once good and inscrutable, as also is Fate, which is one
with Him.... Thedora will share your happiness--for, of course, you will
be happy, and free from want, darling, dearest, sweetest of angels! But
why should the matter be so hurried? Oh, of course--Monsieur Bwikov’s
business affairs. Only a man who has no affairs to see to can afford to
disregard such things. I got a glimpse of Monsieur Bwikov as he was
leaving your door. He is a fine-looking man--a very fine-looking man;
though that is not the point that I should most have noticed had I been
quite myself at the time....
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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