Sitting at home, brooding over his wrongs, with a short and
well-blackened pipe in his mouth, he is giving himself up a victim to
despair and rage. That he can still love her with even, it seems to him,
a deeper intensity than before, is the bitterest drop in his cup. It was
all so sudden, so unexpected. He tortures himself now with the false
belief that she was _beginning_ to love him, that she _might_ have loved
him had time been given him, and had Egypt held Roger but a few months
longer in her foster arms. In a little flash it had all come to him, and
now his life is barren, void of interest, and full of ceaseless pain.
"Bring withered Autumn leaves,
Call everything that grieves,
And build a funeral pyre above his head!
Heap there all golden promise that deceives,
Beauty that wins the heart, and then bereaves,
For love is dead.
"Not slowly did he die.
A meteor from the sky
Falls not so swiftly as his spirit fled--
When, with regretful, half-averted eye,
He gave one little smile, one little sigh,
And so was sped."
These verses, and such as these, he reads between his doleful musings.
It gives him some wretched comfort to believe Dulce had actually some
sparks of love for him before her cousin's return. An erroneous belief,
as she had never cared for him in that way at all, and at her best
moments had only a calm friendship for him. It is my own opinion that
even if Roger had never returned she yet would have found an excuse at
some time to break off her engagement with Gower, or, at least, to let
him understand that she would wish it broken.
To-day is fine, though frosty, and everybody, the children included, are
skating on the lake, which is to be found about half a mile from the
house at the foot of a "wind-beaten hill." The sun is shining coldly, as
though steadily determined to give no heat, and a sullen wind is coming
up from the distant shore. "Stern Winter loves a dirge-like sound," and
must now, therefore, be happy, as Boreas is asserting himself nobly,
both on land and sea.
Some of the _jeunesse doree_ of the neighborhood, who have been lunching
at the Court, are with the group upon the lake, and are cutting (some of
them) the most remarkable figures, in every sense of the word, to their
own and everybody else's delight.
Dulce, who is dressed in brown velvet and fur, is gliding gracefully
hither and thither with her hand fast locked in Roger's. Julia is making
rather an exhibition of herself, and Portia, who skates--as she does
everything else--to perfection, but who is easily tired, is just now
sitting upon the bank with the devoted Dicky by her side. Sir Mark,
coming up to these last two, drops lazily down on the grass at Portia's
other side.
"Why don't you skate, Mark?" asks Portia, turning to him.
"Too old," says Gore.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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