“The commission reports that the evidence submitted for its consideration is sufficient to warrant a finding of the _approximate_ cost of handling and transporting the several classes of second-class mail known as paid-at-the-pound-rate, free-in-county, and transient matter, in so far as relates to the services of transportation, postoffice cars, railway distribution, rural delivery, and certain other items of cost, _but that it is without adequate data to determine the cost of the general postoffice service and also what portion of the cost of certain other aggregate services is properly assignable to second-class mail matter_.… It finds that in the fiscal year 1908 … the cost of handling and transporting second-class mail matter … was about 6 cents a pound for paid-at-the-pound-rate matter, and for free-in-county, and transient matter, each approximately 5 cents a pound, and that upon this basis, as modified by _subsequent deductions in the cost of railroad transportation_, the cost of paid-at-the-pound rate matter, for the services mentioned” (I have not mentioned all the “services” enumerated by the President, all being covered in the words “handling and transportation”), “is approximately 5½ cents a pound.” … That is from the President’s Washington Day message. Can you beat it? Well, it will take a smooth road and some going to do it. First, it is cheerfully admitted that the Commission (the Hughes Commission) had no “adequate data to determine the cost of the general postoffice service and also what portion of the cost of _certain other aggregate services_ is properly assignable to second-class mail matter,” and then our President proceeds--with equal cheerfulness and smiling confidence (_or is it indifference?_) to assure us that the Commission proceeded to figure 6 cents a pound as the cost of handling and carriage of _paid_ pound-rate second-class matter and 5 cents a pound as the cost of corresponding service for _free-in county_ and so-called “transient” matter! Again I ask, can you beat it? If you can, please send me your picture--full size and two views, front and profile. I would derive much pleasure from a look at your front and side elevations. Of course, the President has an official right to a “style” of his own. A “style” of expression, however, cannot be protected by copyright, otherwise, as stated at the opening of this interpolated chapter, President Taft would be guilty of infringement. Other presidents have run into verbose verbosity in expressing themselves. It is an official _convenience_ at times to do so, however ludicrously _open of intent_ or “phunny” it may appear to laymen.