Potash & Perlmutter: Their Copartnership Ventures and AdventuresGlass, Montague
General
Potash & Perlmutter: Their Copartnership Ventures and Adventures
Glass, Montague
Clothing trade -- New York (State) -- New York -- Fiction; Jewish fiction; Jews -- New York (State) -- New York -- Fiction
"That's the way I figured it out, Mawruss," Abe agreed; "and also, I
says to myself, Mawruss will enjoy it a good oitermobile ride."
"_Me!_" Morris cried. "What have I got to do with this here oitermobile
ride, Abe?"
"What have _you_ got to do with it, Mawruss?" Abe repeated. "Why,
Mawruss, I'm surprised to hear you, you should talk that way. You got
everything to do with it. I'm a back number, Mawruss; I don't know
nothing about selling goods to lady buyers, ain't it? You say it
yourself, a feller has got to be up-to-date to sell goods to lady
buyers. So, naturally, you being the up-to-date member of this concern,
you got to take Miss Atkinson out in the oitermobile."
"But, Abe," Morris protested, "I ain't never rode in an oitermobile, and
there wouldn't be no pleasure in it for me, Abe. Why don't _you_ go,
Abe? You say it yourself you lead it a dawg's life on the road. Now,
here's a chance for you to enjoy yourself, Abe, and _you_ should go.
Besides, Abe, you got commercial travelers' accident insurance,
and I ain't."
"The oitermobile ain't coming till half-past one, Mawruss," Abe
replied; "between now and then you could get it a _hundred_ policies
of accident insurance. No, Mawruss, this here lady-buyer business is
up to you. I got a pointer from Sol Klinger to ring up a concern on
Forty-sixth Street, which I done so, and fifteen dollars it costed me.
That oitermobile is coming here for you at half-past one, and after
that all you got to do is to go up to the Prince William Hotel and
ask for Miss Atkinson."
"But, Abe," Morris protested, "I don't even know this here Miss
Isaacson."
"_Not_ Isaacson," Abe repeated; "Atkinson. You'd better write that name
down, Mawruss, before you forget it."
"Never mind, Abe," Morris rejoined. "I don't need to write down things
to remember 'em. I don't have to call a young feller out of his name
just because my memory is bad, Abe. The name I'll remember good enough
when it comes right down _to_ it. Only, why should I go out
oitermobiling riding with this Miss Atkinson, Abe? I'm the inside
partner, ain't it? And you're the outside man. Do you know what I think,
Abe? I think you're scared to ride in an oitermobile."
"Me scared!" Abe cried. "Why should I be scared, Mawruss? A little thing
like a broken leg or a broken arm, Mawruss, don't scare me. I ain't
going because it ain't my business to go. It's your idee, this
lady-buyer business, and if you don't want to go we'll charge
the fifteen dollars what I paid out to profit and loss and call
the whole thing off."
He rose to his feet, thrust out his waist-line and made a dignified
exit by way of closing the discussion. A moment later, however, he
returned with less dignity than haste.
"Mawruss," he hissed, "that young feller--that--that--now, Ike--is
telephoning."
"Well," Morris replied, "one telephone message ain't going to put us
into bankruptcy, Abe."
"Bankruptcy, nothing!" Abe exclaimed. "He's telephoning to his Uncle
Max Tuchman."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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