Well, this prattling letter from Nina caused him some reflection and
some uneasy qualms. He did not so much mind the prospect of having, on
his return, to transform his old friend and comrade into his
stage-sweetheart, and to make passionate love to her every evening
before an audience. That might be a little embarrassing at first; but
the feeling would soon wear off; such circumstances were common and well
understood in the theatre, where stage-lovers cease their cooing the
moment they withdraw into the wings. But this other possibility of
finding Miss Burgoyne and her friends in the immediate neighborhood of
Strathaivron Lodge? Of course there was no reason why she shouldn't
travel through Ross-shire just as well as any one else. She knew his
address. If she came anywhere round this way--say to Kilfearn--he must
needs go to call on her. Then both Lady Adela Cunyngham and Lord
Rockminster had been introduced to Miss Burgoyne in the New Theatre; if
he told them, as he ought, on whom he was going to call, might they not
want to accompany him and renew the acquaintance? Lady Adela and her
sisters considered themselves the naturally appointed patrons of all
professional folk whose names figured in the papers; was it not highly
probable that Miss Burgoyne and her friends, whosoever these might be,
would receive an invitation to Strathaivron Lodge? And then?--why, then
might there not be rather too close a resemblance to a band of poor
players being entertained by the great people at what Nina imagined to
be a castle? A solitary guest was all very well; had Miss Burgoyne
preceded or succeeded him, he could not have objected; but a group of
strolling players, as it were?--might it not look as if they had been
summoned to amuse the noble company? And fancy Miss Burgoyne coming in
as a spy upon his mute, and at present quite indefinite, relations with
Miss Honnor Cunyngham!--Miss Burgoyne, who was a remarkably sharp-eyed
young woman, and had a clever and merry tongue withal, when she was
disposed to be humorous.
Then he bethought him of what Honnor Cunyngham, with her firm
independence of character, her proud self-reliance, would have said to
all these timorous fancies. He knew perfectly well what she would say.
She would say, "Well, but even if Miss Burgoyne were to appear at
Strathaivron Lodge, how could that affect you? You are yourself; you are
apart from her; her visit will be Lady Adela's doing, not yours. And if
people choose to regard you as one of a band of strolling players, how
can that harm you? Why should you care? The opinion that is of value to
you is your own opinion; be right with yourself; and leave others to
think what they please. Whoever could so entirely misjudge your position
must be a fool; why should you pause for a moment to consider the
opinion of a fool or any number of fools? 'To thine own self be true;'
and let that suffice."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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