What the Highland Railway manages to do with the trains which it
despatches from Inverness at 10 P.M. and reproduces the next morning at
Perth about 7, it is impossible for the mind of man to imagine; but it
is not of much consequence so long as you are snugly ensconced in a
sleeping-berth; and Lionel passed the night in profound oblivion. With
the new day, however, these unavailing and torturing regrets began
again; for now he felt himself more completely than before shut off from
the friends he had left; and Strathaivron and all its associations and
pursuits had grown distant like a dream. He was lucky enough, on this
southward journey, to get a compartment to himself; and here was an
excellent opportunity for him to have practised his _vocalises_; but it
was not of _vocalises_, nor of anything connected with the theatre, that
he was thinking. He was much franker with himself now. He no longer
tried to conceal from himself the cause of this vague unrest, this
useless looking back and longing, this curious downhearted sense of
solitariness. A new experience, truly, and a bewildering one! Indeed, he
was ashamed of his own folly. For what was it that he wanted? A mere
continuance of that friendly alliance and companionship which he had
enjoyed all this time? Was he indulging a sort of sentimental misery
simply because he could not walk down to the Aivron's banks and talk to
Miss Honnor and watch the sun tracing threads of gold among her tightly
braided hair? If that were all, he might get out at the next station,
make his way back to the beloved strath, and be sure that Honnor
Cunyngham would welcome him just as of old, and allow him to carry her
waterproof or ask him to have a cast over the Junction Pool. He had no
reason to fear any break in this friendship that had been formed. When
he should see her in Brighton, she would be to him as she had been
yesterday, when they said good-bye by the side of the river. And were
not these the only possible relations between them; and ought he not to
be proud and content that he could look forward to an enduring
continuance of them?
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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